I am exhausted.
I had to go see a specialist yesterday. All I had was a name and the address of the hospital in which she is part of a clinic. I spent my day working, distracting myself from the appointment, as I waited for the time to head out.
My big worry was really my BIG worry.
A few days ago I read an article about how doctor's sometimes don't wish to serve fat people and, even those who do, often have an inability to 'see' anything other than the weight. Putting myself into the hands of someone who's attitude might affect my future isn't an easy thing. But, what are you to do? I simply prepared myself to be prepared for what ever came.
I had a faint hope when I waited in the waiting room. They had a monitor there that flashed information on a variety of subjects. Did you know that falls are the number one cause of death of those over 65?! I had thought that being over 65 was the leading cause of death of those over 65 ... but no, just don't trip and you can live forever. But as I mused these kinds of musings they surprised me.
The monitor showed a picture of someone with a physical and, I think, intellectual disability. The quote below it stated that people with disabilities need to be seen as a person and that medical concerns must be investigated not simply attributed to disability. The actual quote is much cooler that what I've written here. Once I saw it I got out a pen and a piece of paper so that I could write it down, knowing I'd be blogging about it, when it came round again. (Un)Fortunately I was called in to see the specialist before it made another full rotation. But, that simple picture along with the accompanying sentiment was reassuring.
In the end, I had nothing to worry about. I was treated kindly and with respect and I was pleased with the care I received. When I go back, you never really go once to these things, my stress level will be non-existent.
I am reminded, again, and profoundly, about how much trust I am given by those I serve. Trust that my attitude will be welcoming, that my prejudices will be kept in check, that my eyes will see what's in front of me not what's in my imagination.
It's a helluva trust.
I struggle to be worthy of it.
If it takes a visit like today to remind me of that, I'm glad of it.
5 comments:
Thanks for the reminder Dave to trust others and be the person who can be trusted--it's an important reminder as I start out on a really long day. Long days test my patience!
It truly is stuff like this that makes it easier for us to keep going, especially on days when bed-under-blankets seems like a more appealing option.
Looking forward to reading the blog post about what was written.
glad it went well this time.
Whew. Glad this story had a happy ending!
Doctors have too much power - and too often exercise it, treating us like stupid children.
My new one said, flat out, that she didn't believe in CFS. Lovely. I said, "Fine - so test me for everything else that could be the cause of my symptoms." She said she would, but I don't think she did. I'm going again Monday.
Invisible disabilities are hard to live with in many ways - this is only one of them.
Doctors ALSO cause high BP by how they treat you, and then decide your problem IS the high BP - which is why I left the previous one: you shouldn't fear going to see your doctor because it's getting 'confrontational' (not my word - a good friend had the same reason for leaving my previous doctor). But I'm postponing needed medical care because it is so darned hard to get it.
I'm so glad you had a good visit. You are correct - they never manage to fix things in one visit - so you will be back. But respect for the client who LIVES in the body they are seeing for a brief time should be the first part of 'Do no harm.'
Alicia
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