Tuesday, April 01, 2014

The Ark, The Comment, and Murder

We were leaving the theatre after having seen the movie. I was rolling by the poster for Noah, the movie we'd just seen, that was just outside the door, when I was noticed by a man and a woman in line up for another movie. He turned to her and said, loudly enough for me, and others, to hear quite clearly. "There's someone they wouldn't have let on the Ark!" His girlfriend slapped him on the arm but laughed until tears flowed. I was moving slowly, which made me a party to all of this, because there were all sorts of barriers to get around to get back out to the lobby.

I never commented on this comment to Joe.

I just determined that their opinion was not worth bothering about.

But over the evening and into this morning the comment came back, sometimes with force, to the front of my mind. It rankled me. But was most bothersome, was that it simply wouldn't go away. I hear all sorts of shit said about me, loudly, and most if it is bothersome only for a very short period of time, but this, as I said, it rankled.

"Not let on the Ark," means, "not wanted as a member of the human condition," means, "would be better if people like me were eliminated," means not "better of dead," instead means, "better off left to die," means, "murdered."

Murder has been the solution to disability for a very long time.

We have been left in forests.

We have been tossed off mountains.

We have been rounded up by Nazi's.

We have been killed by father's in pick up trucks and mothers in bathtubs.

We have been beaten to death.

We have been starved to death.

We have been chained to walls and died covered in filth.

I have been called names all my life. Fatso and Lardass and Pigface being the most common. When I was young they hurt like hell. When I got older they annoyed like hell.

But what was said to me yesterday, because he wasn't speaking to his girlfriend he was speaking to me - if it's louder than it needs to be, it's for a larger audience - may be the single cruelest thing that anyone has ever said. It may be the most dangerous thing that anyone ever said to me. It tells me that he sees me as not welcome on the Ark and thereby not welcome into community and thereby not welcomed into life.

There are forces, right now, that are itching to pass legislation about "right to die," which is also, of course, though they would never call it that, "right to kill."

We, who are disabled have targets on our backs.

It has always been so.

But now those who wish us dead, who wish us gone, who wish to look upon us no more, have cloaked hate in sheep's clothing ... for our own good (the four words the people with differences fear more than any other) ... we will be slaughtered by those who measure our cost and not our worth.

That man sent me a message.

The only thing that gives me any comfort at all, was that those who got on the Ark, went up a ramp. So maybe, just maybe, he was fucking wrong.


painting with fire said...

He was a total jerk obviously - anyone who would say something like that, let alone say it intentionally so the person it was aimed at would hear it. I think about all the good you do in the world in your life and yet this stuff still stings and how would it not.

I'm not a religious person but it seems to me that if there is any sort of judgement those who promulgate hatred and cruelty are the ones we'd be better off not having around. That said, changing their behavior rather than their actual existence seems like a better goal and one which you've worked towards for a very long time.

Colleen said...

Dear Dave:

I want to call that man all kinds of names but I won't. I am sorry you were his target.

I agree with you. It seems like we are about to repeat history - a history with horrible dehumanizing consequences. I guess as a species we just don't get it - everyone belongs on the Arc. Not only belongs but is needed, desperately needed. If we fail to get that, we are doomed.


Tamara said...

I haven't seen the movie, but it sounds like it didn't teach the same thing as the Bible lesson or he didn't get it. Because, as I remember, the people who got on the Ark, got on because of what was in their hearts. It had nothing to do with anything else - not physical, not mental. What a pitiable person he is.

Anonymous said...

How awful and downright cruel, well it says in the bible that we will all be held accountable for our thoughts and words and while I don't want to judge anyone I suspect I know who will be held most responsible.

Dave Hingsburger said...

I am so sorry Julia and I believe Jan ... I was posting your comments to the blog and something happened and they disappeared. I loved both comments too ... if you've the energy could you repost, if not, I understand!

Anonymous said...

Dear Dave,

my comment was about your love to people and teaching them the "real values" in life.

I canot reconstrouct it exactly; but I wanted to tell that the way you teach people, even I myself feel better with being me. And if more people could and would learn from you, we are able to create an Ark where EVERYBODY would be welcome to travel with.

(Infact we wouldnt need a ark at all, because God need not bring the flood.)

Forget about the little piece of insecurity this guy brought about you. "I love you just the way you are!" if I may be so bold....


Deb said...

I still find it hard to understand that adults can be so ill-mannered and rude as to make disparaging comments on the appearance and disabilities of others.

In the Noah story everyone was *invited* onto the ark. And you're right, it had a ramp. The ones who died in that story were the guys who stood down on the ground and made fun of those who were going inside. It seems we've always had people who considered themselves "wits", but whose actions would indicate otherwise.

jayne wales said...

im speechless! I just cant take much more of this filth out there. What the hell so people think that they are doing when they say anything like that to other people? Im horrified and more than sad.

Anonymous said...

Do they actually let people like that breed?

SammE said...

I've been lurking here lately, having recently found your blog. I would let you on my ark for certain! You have great value in the words you write here, which is the only way I know you. You have huge value as the voice of reason and caring. I love to read your posts. They make me think. They disturb me sometimes, and they make me laugh and wonder other times. I value you. I don't understand people who make comments such as the one made in your hearing. They are unthinking, cruel and pretty hopeless. I wish I could just give you a hug. I value you.

wheeliecrone said...

There have always been people who thought that they had the right to designate who could and could not share the planet with them. They are ignorant. They do not realise that we are all here to learn lessons in our lives. They are refusing to learn. I find it difficult to pity them, because of the anger I feel when they say hurtful and ignorant things, but it is pity that they deserve, in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

It is interesting that it only took until chapter 6 of Genesis for man to corrupt what God had made. The Bible speaks of: "they were corrupt"; "man's wickedness was widespread"; "every scheme his mind thought of was nothing but evil all the time"; "corrupt in God's sight"; "the earth was filled with violence"...you get the picture. One has to wonder about the heart of the man you encountered. Yet God always "finds His man" - He found Noah, he found Abraham, he found David - and ultimately sent His Son. Be encouraged Dave, for surely He has found you - and your voice and heart can be used to speak into the wilderness. I am truly sorry for the hurt you feel. Only 8 went on the ark, 8! Good and faithful men are hard to find. Be of good cheer - what the Lord has begun in you He will continue to do.

B. said...

Enjoyed the reference to the ramp -- historical accessibility. Thanks.

Tina said...

Dear Dave, this is the first time I've read your blog and I hurt for you hearing the ignorance and.cruelty you have to endure on a regular basis. I hope you can take a little comfort in tbe fact that God definitely didn't allow that guy's kind onto the ark. People like him are the reason it was necessary to build it in tbe first place. Keep your chin up and pity the poor fools who miss out on knowing some amazing people due to their own prejudice and stupidity.

Anonymous said...

Dear Dave,

I finally found the very fitting quote again by Alan Cohen to the situation you did describe.

Hope you like it too.

“It is not insult from another that causes you pain. It is the part of your mind that agrees with the insult. Agree only with the truth about you, and you are free.”


Unknown said...

That guy absolutely sucked! But I'm glad you wrote this because every word of it is true.

Ron Arnold said...

The dude was a total douche - no doubt, but you touched on something vital, and critical. Thank you for saying it - because in my eyes, the most wicked tyranny is that which masks itself as being benevolent. "Right to die" does indeed lead to "Right to kill" and when imbued with the 'moral authority' (cough cough) of law . . . the end result is not good.

I am not a fan of government and the mantle of righteousness it cloaks itself with when doing something 'for own good' - lots of evil comes from that particular idea.

Back to the douche - on an individual level, I like to let karma do her work. She's never let me down. :)

Molly said...

This makes me sad and angry and frustrated. I like to think he was fucking wrong too.