Friday, June 03, 2016

Me Before .. WTF Not This Again

Hey, Hollywood!!

Hey, Hey, Over Here.

Yeah, it's me, the fat guy in the wheelchair.

Listen up.


Do you know what I'm doing right now?

Right now.

Right freaking now.

Nope, that's not it. No empty pill bottle beside me.

Nope, that's not it. I don't even own a razor blade.

Nope, that's not it either.


Right now I'm not in a movie theatre readying myself to see 'You Before Me. That's where I'm not. And it's not the same as the fact that I'm also not at "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles," or as they are better known in the disability community, "The Boys." You know how it is different? I just happen to be missing TMNT.

I am pointedly, and with every fibre of my being NOT at "Me Before You."

So you know what I'm doing to protest the latest in a series of disability snuff films?

I'm living.

Yep, the outrageous act of living.

I just finished supper with my husband, who though I am disabled will not smother me in my sleep tonight. He may be tempted but because a couple of times today I was an asshole, not because he helps me put on my socks.

Oh, and tomorrow.

You know what I'm going to do tomorrow to protest your propaganda vehicle masquerading as a 'romance' movie?

I'm going to go to work.


Don't hurt yourself if you fall over, if you get a splinter we may have to end your suffering quickly.

Not only am I going to go to work, all day I am going to pointedly not be at the movies watching your latest opus wherein fictional disabled people are created by non disabled people and portrayed by non disabled people wherein we get killed, again.

Guess what I know a lot of people.

A whole movement of people.

Who are pointedly not going to your movie. Right now.

I know you don't care.

But the fact that our asses remain in our chairs, not yours, will one day matter. Really matter. Because we are a movement that is growing, we are coming into our own, we are beginning to feel our power.

We will have the power, if not now shortly, to call you out.


Yeah, we know what you are.

We even know that you know its and think you are getting away with it.

You're not.

And even if you don't return the favour ...

We see you.


ssassefras said...

Hey, thanks for the heads-up. WTF. The preview is all these pretty visuals and smiles, and BOOM, great to know it's all that disability euthanasia porn again. And goddammit, it is porn -- the very bad kind. It's about pleasure and entertainment from exploiting people as things, as objects, and people specifically chosen for this eploitation again and again. Goddamn it. Gross, Hollywood.

Unknown said...

THANK YOU! My husband is a quad, and I read the book a few years ago. I was really excited about it because I wanted to read something similar to our love story. I was willing to overlook a few things she wrote about the disability experience, but when I got to the end, it killed me. I was devastated and angry for days. That someone who was so similar to my husband (and several of our friends!) would be portrayed and given such an ending like that was heart wrenching. Now that the movie is coming out, not only am I not seeing it, I am actively encouraging everyone I know not to go see it. Hubby actually finds it pretty funny cause I start yelling at the TV every time it comes on! It's crap, and hopefully people start recognizing it as such.

ABEhrhardt said...

I hated Million Dollar Baby, too - suicide is not the way to deal with having problems.

Your loved ones will miss you. Forever. And wonder what the heck THEY did wrong, and how we didn't see it in time to help, and why the family member we lost was more interested in his desire not to bother anyone than to own up and let us help.

No, it is not 'better' without you.

I have been disabled for 27 years. I have contributed to my family and will continue to contribute, even if nothing more than by being here to talk to. Some days it is incredibly hard. Many more days it is joyful.

Liz said...

Non-disabled ally also pointedly NOT GOING.

Unknown said...

Don't watch TV or go to movies much, had to look up the title to find out the plot. UGH!! And let's hurl a few rotten tomatoes at the author, the publisher, and the publicists as well!
I did see that this book was originally published in Britain - where Dignitas is much more accessible (geographically) than it is for the those of us in the US and Canada. (Oh, the irony of the term 'accessible' just hit me - but it was the word that came so I will let it stand.)
I am in California, where the physician aid in dying law comes into effect in a few days. The law is written so that eligibility is limited to individuals who have a life limiting condition with a prognosis of 6 mo or less, and are not clinically depressed, and can self administer the medication as certified by 2 different MDs in separate evaluations at least 2 weeks apart. Very different from Dignitas and the Canadian law, based on my limited understanding of them.

As I write, I realized that most European countries and Canada have a national health plan. That maybe gives insensitive and prejudiced people the basis of thinking that they have a right to decide the value of your life for you, with the hidden bias that you are taking away money that might be used for their benefit?
Americans have that attitude, too..but i wonder if a single payer health system helps feed the attitude that the lives of the disabled are miserable and without value .
Enjoy your vacation, Dave..and don't go to the movies! Clairesmum

Unknown said...

In response to Alicias comment, the difference between suicide and suicide by a visibly disabled person is that those "why did they do it, what did we miss, why didnt they ask for help" questions dont usually exist when the dead person was disabled. People dont mourn certain disabled suicides because they believe the "better off dead" bulls**t. We dont even call it suicide, its "right to die" or other euphemisms. And at the same time able-bodied-seeming people get locked up, restrained and medicated to stop them taking their own lives.

Because society thinks them being alive matters, even if theyre suffering, miserable and dont have a functioning or non-traumatic life. Whereas I've lost count of the number of people who've told me to my face that they couldnt cope if it was them in my situation, with my really-not-very-severe disabilitys and unmet-because-society-sucks care needs, and that theyd give up and kill themselves if they were me. And nobody ever seems to get why thats offensive to me. Or that the hardest thing about becoming 'a visably disabled person' is other peoples attitudes and devaluing of me.

I come from a creative career background and I would love to be able to make a film of 'my story', but it would flop with mainstream audiences because society doesnt want to be challenged on its repulsive but comfortable to them views of disability and disabled lives. They want the tragi-porn or they want the "inspirational", they dont want to know about our realitys. And thats why this latest snuff film will be raved about all over the internet no matter how loudly we protest it, sadly