Tuesday, March 25, 2008


At 12:30 yesterday we accepted an offer on our house. We've agreed upon the end of July as our closing date and we shook hands on a price. All morning I fretted and worried about the meeting. The usual insecurities about 'are we doing the right thing' and 'is Joe's new enthusiasm for the move real or put on for my benefit' and 'how will it be to live in an apartment again' and 'what do we do with all that stuff' and 'I'm scared.' As we sat down to meet a lovely young couple and talk seriously about the house I could see real excitement in their eyes as they described the houses they've looked at and how much they love this one, about how their kids were going to love living there, about the local school and the neighbourhood. I caught a bit of their excitement.

The they asked us how we came to decide to sell. Joe passed the question over to me and I explained that living as a person with a disability in the country was ultimately isolating, that there were so many things that need to be done with houses that I can't do anymore and my fears won't let Joe do, that we had loved living in the city when we lived there before and would love living there again. They listened and nodded, it all made sense to them.

So it was all set. Then Joe went with the wife down into the basement to look at something she wanted to see and I was left with the husband. He asked how I got into working with people with disabilities and surprised me by telling me that his brother had an intellectual disabilities and how that experience made a difference for him. He talked about the teasing and name calling his brother experienced and how it had made an impression on him and how it had affected him as a parent. I found myself liking this guy and thinking what lucky kids he had.

It wasn't important, or even necessary, for us to like the people moving into our house - but it is a gift. There were times that this whole process seemed pre-ordained - it's been so smooth and painless. We actually sat and talked about how we could help each other out, they were saying that they were young and strong and that anything we didn't want, just leave and they'd either use or cart it away for us. That they'd clean and paint and do all that stuff so - don't worry about it. We agreed that they could have access to the house whenever they wanted to check things out and move things in, organize themselves.

So it was done. I had worried needlessly, they left happy with the meeting and we were left thinking, "I'm glad it's them'.

Now we begin the search for our next home. We've decided on getting an apartment for now and think about the future later. But ultimately we aren't too worried. We've lived happily in big places and small, we'll be OK. And I'm picturing having a greater amount of independance, greater freedom, and a little more of the life I had before my disability. I don't care that I'm moving around in my chair, I just want options.

But it was nice to like them.



wendy said...

Congrats on the smooth sale of your house. That, in itself, is a minor miracle. Every time my partner and I have moved over the years we've been going to something that was better for us in some way. Still, leaving something else behind has never been easy. I'm glad you like the people who've bought your house...I think it makes a little easier to entrust them with what has been your home. I hope you find a new place that is comfortable and feels like home. I wish you a search that is as simple and painless as the sale was!

lina said...

And I don't think it's weird - it's a place you are leaving with fond memories - of great times alone and with friends and it feels good to know that those feelings will continue to carry on in that home. How exciting all this is! Good luck with the move, and hang on for the ride of your life - but you already know that!

Betsy said...

Wow - congratulations! It was such a big decision for you to make - I'm glad that it went so smoothly.

And YAY for letting your audience know where you'll be - I've missed you a few times in Ottawa, and I'd love to see your lectures.

All 4 My Gals said...

I'm happy for you that someone you liked will be in your home. Good luck finding a new place that you will love and enter the next stage of your life in. Much happiness will be found there, I have no doubt!

Susan said...

A new adventure! Congratulations Dave and Joe.

I just hope there's a Chapters/Starbucks nearby. :o)

moplans said...

Congratulations! It is wonderful how this has worked out to the benefit of all.
I look forward to hearing about the hunt for your new home.

Anonymous said...

Congrats Dave and Joe,
Somehow, even though it shouldn't, liking the people makes such a difference. Good for all of you!

Anonymous said...

I am glad it all went well for you both.


lola x

Kei said...

Congratulations Dave & Joe! And how cool to really like the people who will continue to fill your home with love, laughter and memories.

Tammy said...

I'm very happy for you that it went smoothly and both parties seem happy with the deal. It just seems like this was meant to happen for you. Perhaps living back in town, God has a specific plan for both you and Joe.

Anonymous said...

Call me fanciful, but I do believe that houses acquire something of the people who've lived in them before. And it is that something that speaks to prospective buyers even more than the number of bedrooms or the shade of the walls.

I hope you find a true home - not just a house.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations! Recently, our family flew to Ottawa for a househunting trip. I thought I preferred to see the houses without the sellers there...but on our second to last day of looking, we visited a house that was being sold privately (but agents were welcomed at a certain percentage.)

Anyway, that was "the" house. The seller was home, with her two boys, and the immediate rapport between us sold me on the house. She obviously made such happy memories there...I knew that it was home for us.

Good luck on your search for a new home!

Karen Putz said...

Happy home hunting! It's always hard to leave a place where you've planted memories. I've moved three times in the same town and each time, it was bittersweet.