I was waiting to be served soup and had decided to ask for salad as well. As soup was being poured, before the salad got underway, I got some very serious negative vibes from the server. His displeasure in serving me grew ever more obvious and, finally, in frustration, I took the soup and told him to skip the salad. The woman standing beside me, being served by the other fellow there, was an employee in the same building where the lunch counter was. She could see I was upset.
She scooted up beside me as I waited at the till to pay, she said, with a friendly smile, "Don't worry about him, he is just really uncomfortable around people with disabilities." She was charm itself. Her smile froze on her face as she saw the thunder forming on mine.
It took a great deal of self control for this not to become an out and out scene.
He pissed me off.
She enraged me.
He was a bigot.
She wanted to make that fact acceptable to me.
What the hell was I supposed to say, "Oh, well, that's OK then" or maybe, "That's OK, I certainly understand why he'd hate us cripples."
Really, what response did she expect.
Oh, don't worry, she's just a bit racist.
Oh, never you mind he's a tad misogynist.
Really, really ...REALLY??
I told her the truth. I told her that what she said made the situation worse. Here I was just thinking that he was a garden variety jerk and now I find out that his behaviour was actually targeted at me for being who I am. I asked her if she understood that.
She went from charming to, um, less so.
She was only trying to help.
If you are wondering if a letter of complaint has been written and sent.
That would be a YES.