Thursday, February 08, 2007

That Word

Empower.

Grrrrr.

There are some words which just piss you off. I hate this word.

"We empower our clients."

First - they don't belong to you - so drop the 'our'.

Second - no one empowers anyone else.

It's a trick word, it allows me to oppress you for years and then when I get tired from holding you down and decide to let you up on your knees I can sound like I'm munificient because I'm releasing the grip a bit.

Empower is only a word an oppressor can use.

Taking courses in counselling and looking at the dynamics of power, one thing was made quite clear to me, my job is not, ever, to empower anyone. I am not God - I can't gift power. My job is to help people discover the power they've had all along, and then help them learn to use it. Power come from taking breath.

We do not give people with disability a voice. They've always had it. Choosing to listen is a choice that the powerful make. But the voice is not our gift, God did that.

We do not give people with disabilities rights. They've always had them. Choosing to respect those rights is a choice that the powerful make. But rights are not our gift, citizenship did that.

We do not give people with disabilities power. They've always had it. Choosing to allow power to be used is a choice that the powerful make. But power is not our gift, life did that.

Why do we always want to see ourselves as liberators, when the liberation needed is from the liberators.

Empower.

Try it on for size yourself. Imagine your boss says, "I empowered you to succeed" or your spouse says, "I'm proud that I empowered you to make dinner". Don't you feel like putting your fist through the computer screen.

Arrrgh.

Empower.

Nails on a chalkboard.

Empower.

Always said with self concious self satisfaction.

Empower.

It's a word about me - not about you.

Empower.

Never enough to challenge us, but enough to require gratitude, a 'thank you'.

Empower.

I really, really, really hate that word.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Dave- So, now, do I. Thanks, Frances

lina said...

Oh, so I didn't empower you to write this blog Dave?
Hmm - now I'm confused - but give me time!!!
(can you hear me laughing!)

Belinda said...

"Power Play"--The dynamics of power--they are at play in every relationship--whether we know it or not.

Dave's challenge on the use of the word "empower" caused me to consider why and how I have used that word.

I agree with the point that people's power belongs to them intrinsically, but as we've been sensitized to how power has been taken away in the past--we've searched for a way to rectify that, and the reverse, at first glance, would seem to be to em-power.

My question is--if we can take it away--can we not give it back?

I know--it's not ours to give or take away in the first place--but the taking away has been done. I just think that a lot of agencies have used that term--even including it in their name or list of values--with the best of intentions.

Thanks for another thought provoking post.

Anonymous said...

Ooh, I think you might enjoy reading this post, Dave. Warning: it's long. Don't start to read it two minutes before you need to leave for somewhere...

http://qw88nb88.wordpress.com/2006/11/26/our-hidden-power/

Anonymous said...

In the early days of the org my wife and I founded I know we had that "empower" word right up front and center. At the time (at least where we are located) it was considered quite radical to have the perspective that there was any sort of "problem" with respect to power and people with intellectual disabilities so the intent of the "empower" word was to indicate that we were recognizing the problem in some way and trying to be involved in doing something about it.

I think of it is a clumsy but well-intentioned step towards supporting self-advocacy and learning to better understand power in its many forms. That said, the "e" word has been on my "do not use" list for some time, and I try to explain to media people why they should stop using it too...but then they still don't understand that "mentally disabled person" is not a very helpful phrase.

ballastexistenz said...

Like andrea, I have a post to reference here, also somewhat long:

You Come Into My Home...

Anonymous said...

Dave,

I hope that you don't mind, but this rambling made me want to share it wider. I have shamelessly stolen your words and quoted you on a poster (although I did sneak in a few asterisks to disguise the expletives :o) ). I will stick the poster up on the wall when I am doing person centred planning awareness sessions - hopefully people will read it and share my sentiments.
I have also included the address for your blogspot.

Anonymous said...

Hi, Dave here, my permission is given to anyone anywhere who wants to use my blog stuff for anything (except sale) to go ahead and use it as long as I am credited as writer and the blog is given as the source. So thanks for wanting to ...

Dave Hingsburger
I appear as anonymous because I'm borrowing a computer and just signed on to check and see if there were any new posts.

Doug The Una said...

EMPOWER, v.t. To reprogram.

Anonymous said...

Great post, and a good summarization of why that word always grated on my nerves.

And Belinda, yes you can give the power back, but the problem with describing it as "empowering" is that it creates a distorted picture. If you realize you've taken away someone's power to control their lives, the right thing to do is let go. But that isn't a noble charitiable act; it's not continuing to mistreat them. You wouldn't concoct a word like "emsecurement" to describe the act of a man not beating his wife any more.

Ettina said...

How about if you are giving back power *someone else* took away? Such as a counselor helping a sexual abuse survivor learn that they really do have a right to say no?