Monday, December 08, 2008

Coffee Chatter

The hotel we are staying in has both a Health Club and a Starbucks and, along with a trendy bar, is a hit with the locals. Over the weekend we've seen people streaming in and out of the hotel. I've been struggling to get over a cough that's be plaguing me for several days, so Sunday I just stayed in. After breakfast we asked the front desk if our room could be made up so that I could then snuggle in it for most of the day.

We went to Starbucks for a tea while we waited. We took a table that was easy to access with the chair. Off to the side was a man of about 40 who was lounging with a cup of fancy style coffee. He looked like he was on the way into or out of the gym. He radiated fitness and health. He looked up at us when we came in and then away with a grimace - perhaps of disgust, perhaps of loathing - I don't know and get so i don't care.

Joe helped get the footrests up and then said he wanted to get some postcards from teh room for us to do while we waited. Shortly after, our nieghbour got up to refill his coffee, I heard him speak to the clerk who he obviously knew well. "I wonder if these people know what burdens they are to others and if they actually choose to inflict their needs onto society."

He'd said it loud enough for me to hear.

I didn't respond.

I hate to admit this, but I had been wondering something similar myself over the last couple of months. There is so much more I need than I did before. The amount of work Joe has to do to get me from place to place. The need I have of specialized transportation at home. My application for a power wheelchair. My heavy use of the drug benefit through work. Sometimes I feel like a user. Sometimes I wonder who benefits from the struggle to go on ...

I'm not suicidal, never have been, don't understand it ... but I do get down. Sometimes life seems hard and people seem mean. Why did that man, that day, have to enter into my world with negativity. I was already down from having this cough and having to stay in for the day. What need I of him?

But I get up today ready to go back to the work of living. And part of the work of living is to keep purpose in front and asinine comments in the trash.

And besides, there are needs to be inflicted on others - and I'm the man to do it.

Ah, purpose.

13 comments:

rickismom said...

Look again at yesterday's post and try to tell me again that you are a burden.
[As for suicide,if anyone outside there thinks about it, please don't. Someone close to me committeed suicide lately (was terminilly ill), and their spouse was devestated.] You should not decide you are a burden. And certainly not a stranger.

Heike said...

Yeah, and does this wanker know what a burden he his to live with?

We are all users of government services and kindness of others. And we are all givers. Of love, and care, and advice, and stories, and power to say no.

We all have crap days, and you're entitled to yours. Even if the universe sends wankers your way, you know that we know you are GREAT and WE NEED YOU.

Spinningfishwife said...

I wonder how much he gives back to society on a day to day basis?
I think you pull your weight in that respect, Dave. More than most folk, I think. So just ignore the rude arsehole person. What does he know?

Tamara said...

I doubt he has an audience quite like yours, Dave. Think it would be bad to take a picture of the next guy like that you meet? Then we could all be on the lookout ... :-)

I sometimes wonder how many teachers sitting around the IEP table have the same thoughts ... especially after they open their mouths and all that comes out is "lifeskills" ...

Anonymous said...

He obviously buys into the fiction of individual as island....the truth is we are all interdependent and rely on other for help and supportlin different ways and at different times. It's the human condition - without this propensity, we would be wild animals.

What he fails to understand is that at any time our status as island can be removed in the blink of an eye. Perhaps a small taste of reality would do him no harm...

Anonymous said...

We'll have to compare health benefit costs when you get back - bet you I got you beat! LOL MDN

Anonymous said...

Diagnosis: Level Four Asshole

Treatment: Removing Starbucks, gym, cell phone and vehicle. In extreme circumstances,legs may have to be broken. Immediately implement use of non- power wheelchair that is fifteen years old, and keep up a steady diet of suet pudding and day old donuts.

Prognosis: Grim, but if enough suffering occurs, diagnosis may be altered to Level 3 Asshole.

Rosemary said...

I have heard all kinds of unkind comments through the years. Usually, I try very hard and am able to block them from my thoughts. Sometimes, despite trying hard, I do remember and feel pretty down. I do know that my family and friends appreciate and love me. That keeps me going. Big hugs to you.

FridaWrites said...

What a jackass he is. I'm back in aggressive mood, having run into my 5th grade PE teacher today.

Anonymous said...

Oddly enough I have seen some burdens of society and they are never people with disabilities. Sorry you had such a bad day.

Belinda said...

I doubt that he has as many friends as you do, or as good! :) He's certainly not getting apple pie!

theknapper said...

What arrogance......one day he's going to have a very long & painful crash....

Terri said...

I hope your Storey Man post re-energized you from this day. The work of daily life piles up on people sometimes (disability is not the only cause of this.) People are not burdens unless they make the world a worse place when they are done. Starbucks man diminishes the world by opening his mouth--you give and give and give...