So, this morning I'm worried.
Last night after we got home, Joe was very quiet. I went into my office like I always do to check emails from the day, see if there are any comments on the blog and play a game of Mah Jong. It's a little ritual, I like it. But it was different because there were no sounds of Joe puttering around in the other room. Joe putts. He is the kind of guy who can always find something to do and is always busy at something. We've all teased him about it. Having a bunch up to watch a DVD is great, but when Joe gets up to get a beer or go to the can, he's not back for 15 to 20 minutes because he starts puttering around. Drives us all mad.
But there was only quiet from the other room. So silent that I quit my game and came out to see what was up. Joe was sitting on a chair in the front room. He looked ashen. I immediately got scared. I came in and sat down, asked him what was wrong.
"My heel, it's unbearable."
Joe has been limping for a while and after xrays it was determined he has a spur in his heel that has to be surgically removed. Joe suggested that he go through the surgery in the summer when we are travelling less. (Oh, yeah, and moving.) I got up and got him a pain killer and in a very short time he was feeling better and putter sounds were coming from the kitchen. I offered help, he didn't want it.
He's in bed right now, sleeping, he took a sleeping pill because the pain was back and bothering him. I won't wake him until it's necessary.
I feel so helpless.
I feel like there is something I should be doing - but I don't know what.
After the years that Joe has taken care of me, I should have picked up on what I should do to take care of him.
We have a busy couple of days in front of us, I've got to be down to the office early today. This afternoon we've got to go look at an apartment. Then tomorrow we're planning to see Mike, Merrissa, Ruby and Joseph on the occasion of the kids 14th birthday - it means a drive to Belleville and back. A drive on Joe's bad foot.
He doesn't know it yet, but his needs come first.
He doesn't put himself forward much, prefers to be in the background, all decisions about the next couple of days will be about his needs.
That, at least, is a gift I can give him.
The question is - can I make him take the gift?