Thursday, April 05, 2018

Unnecessary Doors

It looked planned, scripted, a snippet of a sit com.

I was lapping the mall, just wanting to burn off some stress from work. The mall is very particular with it's mall walkers club about the exact route you need to take to get the full distance marks. The only one of the stipulations that annoy me is where, downstairs, I have to dip into a sort hallway that leads to exit doors. I go down one side, cross in front of the doors to the other side and then turn and head back. It's short but it involves difficult pushing.

There are lots of people coming in and going out that need to be maneuvered by, the aria in front of the door is carpeted, and crossing in front of the doors is always very difficult because everyone thinks that what I'm doing is wrong. They keep dashing to open doors which I don't want to go through and I have to keep explaining what I'm doing. The explaining is hard because by then I'm puffing as I speak and I lose a lot of energy with the talk.

But a couple of days ago, it was hilarious. I pushed down to the doors and a woman coming in the door that I was heading to, opened that door and stood by to let me pass. I just shook my head and turned the chair so she dashed to the next door to open it. I was by that one before she'd managed to get it open, then she dashed as fast as she could to get to the next door, trying to figure out exactly where I was going to exit. Then when she got to the last door, the first time that I wasn't a little ahead of her, having the carpet and traffic to navigate, I puffed out, "I'm just lapping the mall, but thanks."

To her credit she saw the humour in the situation.

And then she said, "Good for you!" like she was complimenting a puppy.

I just shook my head and rolled away. Once I rounded the corner I stopped and laughed. Her dash across the entrance needlessly opening doors and the desperate look on her face to help me - it was funny. And so was the look on the faces of the people she nearly pushed over trying to get to doors to open them for me.

Ah, the good times just keep on rolling.

3 comments:

clairesmum said...

Gotta laugh when you can....otherwise life would be grim indeed!
It does look like a bit from that old old TV show "Candid Camera".

Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt said...

You just can't win these. Possibly you made her aware, but it's just one person even if you did.

Until someone does what you just did, in a sit com, the world will continue on, blissfully unaware.

Maybe a sit com - The Rolling Life - or a reality TV show! about the perils of life as a disabled person, from the funny side. Starring our own Dave Hingsburger!!!

Forgive me, I'm a writer.

clairesmum said...

Alicia, ditto what you said!
Maybe the students at the local college that has some disabilities studies classes (if memory and word choices are correct) and some adults who are 'disability proud" might collaborate?
I bet you and Alicia might make good script writers or 'advisors'.

My imagination is busy too, Alicia. But it's a fun idea to play with....and maybe it becomes real.....