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I met a man
At a dinner party.
Who got very quiet
When I answered his question.
What do you do for a living? he asked.
I told him, with pride, what I did
"I am a behaviour therapist," I said.
"Oh," was all he said
before he left the table.
The host got up
and followed his friend
out of the room.
He came back and asked
"What did you say to him?"
I told him about
our brief conversation.
"Oh, no!" he said,
"Oh, no!"
His friend
had been
involuntarily
admitted
to a
psychiatric
facility
for
behavioural
conversion
therapy.
It involved
using
shocks
for
punishment
at
any
sign
of
arousal
to
pictures
of
men.
They
put
a
gauge
around
his
penis
and
showed
him
male
images
and
shocked
him
and
shocked
him
and
shocked
him
if his body
responded.
Again
and again
they
burned
his
flesh.
He was left
scarred
body
and
mind
by
people who do
what I do.
That I wouldn't
didn't matter.
All that mattered
was that
someone had.
He left
the party.
The seat
beside
me
stayed
vacant.
I sat
silenced
unit it was time
to go.
That
man
one
day,
when I
ran
into him
at a
parade,
told
me
it
took
years
but
that
pride
had
begun
to
heal
his
wounds.
But,
he told me,
sometimes
when
he
makes
love
to
his
husband,
he
can
smell
the
light
scent
of
the
flesh
on
his
arm
being
burnt
by
one
shock
after
another.
I wouldn't ever
do that.
But it's been
done.
And
ultimately
that's
all that
matters.
Take
warning
those
who
wield
and
misuse
power.
Pride
will,
one day,
bring
you
down.
10 comments:
horrifying.
clairesmum
I have ME/CFS. RIGHT NOW CBT is being used all around the world to tell people like me that it's all in our head, that we exaggerate our symptoms, that we are losers living off the public trough, that we just need to get our heads straight, exercise more, and stop whining.
It's on the CDC website, even though CDC says ME/CFS is real.
It's on the Mayo Clinic website (they charge thousands for putting you through it).
It is being shot down, time after time by people like statisticians, and David Tuller (who has a crowdfunding up to pay for another year at Berkeley of his award-winning journalism; he has a PhD in Public Health from UCBerkeley).
I know it isn't as bad as what people were put through 'back then.' And THEY should get apologies and compensation - which is not happening. Current 'Christian' conversion therapy is happening. And vulnerable sick people, children included, are being told it's their fault they're sick and don't get better with the crappy 'therapy' the state will pay for. Or they can purchase at Mayo.
You hit a very sore current nerve - thank you for being brave enough to bring it up.
What a terrible, inhumane, awful, and important story. Thank you for telling it.
I am in tears without adequate words;
I do appreciate you sharing this, these horror truths need to have a voice.
Thank God foreverything that has contributed to this man's life in a healing way. We must continue tirelessly and loudly supporting one another.
CBT and conversion "therapy" are starkly different things. The latter is torture and abuse. It is an atrocity that people have been subjected to this. There is nothing that compares to the torture and abuse that people like the man Dave met have been subjected to endure. Heartbreaking.
Purpletta
Alicia, Certainly no one should ever question anyone else's medical condition & I am sorry if that has happened to you.
Purpletta
Disabled children are still being given skin burning electric shocks as 'behaviour therapy' and gay people around the world are still being tortured and murdered. We have a long way to go before we can look back in horror at these atrocities as a past thing
"CBT and conversion "therapy" are starkly different things. The latter is torture and abuse. It is an atrocity that people have been subjected to this. There is nothing that compares to the torture and abuse that people like the man Dave met have been subjected to endure. Heartbreaking."
It's not the same, true. But that doesn't mean there's no comparison.
I will say that CBT works wonders for some people. But it is really damaging when CBT is misapplied. I've had therapists get into arguments with me because CBT doesn't work on me and makes me feel worse, but they can't conceive of CBT not always being the best option in any situation. To me, it feels like CBT is blaming me for making myself unhappy, and I end up going into thought spirals whenever I try it. And my problem actually *is* something that responds to psychotherapy, just not that kind. I can't imagine what it would be like for someone with ME/CFS, who has a physical problem.
Right now, also, behavior therapies are being used on kids like me, trying to rewire their brains. I don't have any objection to teaching a kid useful skills like using a toilet or doing math, mind you. But if you use aversives, have them working on therapy 40 hours a week, try to change something they can't control, or try to change things that are core identity, then you will hurt the person. (The conversion therapy example is three of those together. Many autistic kids get all four.)
Ettina Kitten,
I agree with you that "good therapy," misapplied, can be damaging, just as any type of health care misapplied can be damaging. Taken to the extreme either could become abusive.
But used appropriately and ethically with patients who are consenting and benefiting, these things can be beneficial.
On the other hand recipes touted as "treatment" which at their core disrespect and dehumanize people, which devalue people, which target those who are vulnerable or even non-consenting... these regardless of their application are unethical and abusive.
Coversion therapy falls in to the latter ...it is categorically unethical and abusive. When applied as it was supposedly intended it is torture.
This is where I was coming from with the note that CBT and conversion therapy don't compare. But certainly any therapy used to harm is terribly wrong. And in my own opinion therapy that doesn't value the person (i.e. you or me) as an important part of a collaborative process is a bit short-sighted. Sorry that you had the experience of a therapist not trusting and respecting your own instincts about you. I have had a similar experience and have been thankful to find a therapist who will work with me not on me.
So very sad and tragic. Holding the power of the ones you guide can so easily cross lines. Human rights can be over stepped by well meaning guardians and staff alike.
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