Sunday, May 17, 2015

The Accessi-glance

Photo description: Young man in wheelchair glancing over his left shoulder.
Joe was in paying the florist so I headed across the street to pick up some beer at the Beer Store. After crossing the street I headed up towards the store. I noticed, as I was passing, a new Mexican restaurant had opened. I love Mexican food and have been looking for a really good Mexican restaurant for some time. When I realized what the restaurant was I did a quick glance back at the door to see if it was accessible.

As I did so one of the fellows eating in the restaurant, beside large open windows, said to me, "You're an expert in the accessi-glance, I see." I laughed at the term and stopped my chair. He told me that his husband had used a power wheelchair the last few years of his life and he too did the accessi-glance all the time, "He'd notice a place he wanted to go in and he'd take a quick look, it only takes a second to see if a place is accessible."

I told him I was sorry about his loss, I could see that talking about his husband was still a bit painful but I could also see that he was enjoying the memories. I agreed that it only takes the briefest of looks to know. "He called it the accessi-glance, and it's funny because even though he's gone now, I still do it myself. I always feel a bit guilty going places where he couldn't." I didn't know what to say, so I said instead, "Well, I thank you for the new term, I'm going to use 'accessi-glance' all the time, because I do it all the time."

"Do you think he'd be pissed at me for going places like this, that he couldn't get in?"

"Did he love you?"


"Then, no, I don't think he'd be angry, after all you still notice and you still remember."

"He was a remarkable man."

"So are you," I said, leaving him wrapped in memories.


Kris S. said...

1. Lovely story.
2. So the new restaurant ISN'T accessible? Dang.

Liz said...

I love this conversation and that, as your own wedding draws closer, you've been given someone else's memories to hold and to honour. And you've done so, beautifully.

Anonymous said...

Your stories are so perfect. I love your blog. Thank you.

Rosemary said...

So beautiful

I, too, check out new places, curbs and sidewalk-obstacles (especially on trash day).

Anonymous said...

Oh, what a great story. Thank you for sharing it.