Tuesday, October 09, 2012

With The Assist of Elephants

It's really only a few days until we fly to London and, as we'll be in the UK for exactly a month, we spent Thanksgiving Monday hunkered down in our housecoats, our books and a couple of DVD sets. We ate left overs and generally set about the task of winding down from one trip and gearing up for another.Sometimes it seems that we need to soak in "home."

For the first time I'm finding that that idea of travelling, though the work appeals to me, I like the opportunities that I have to teach and to learn, I am weary of the unpredictability of access. Our home is arranged to accommodate both our tastes and our needs. While we can both easily cope with the idea of 'non-offensive design' when it comes to travel. Art that is aimed at being there without being there, music that is played to be played not listened to, furniture that is way more function than form. We get that. So taste isn't even a consideration for travel. But, needs, are and continue to be needs.

Accessibility, though, is still, no matter the cautions taken, a crap shoot. On our last trip every single room we had was fully accessible and met our needs. Awesome. But that didn't mean that we both didn't have anxiety every single time we checked into a new hotel. Once trust is broken, it's broken. We know that the rooms booked for this trip will be booked properly, that the hotels have guaranteed that we will be able to get in the room, use the room and leave the room - all we really ask for, but that doesn't mean, always that our definition of an accessible entrance - flat, is the same as theirs - only two stairs.

I realise that this will come across as whining. I realise that it is a privilege to travel and to get to do what I do. I do realise all that. But I want to chronicle here how it is to live with a disability in a world where accessibility is not a right, where accessibility is still considered a frill and where purposeful exclusion still exists. Maybe its because I'm getting older, maybe its because I'm tired of having the experience, both, of being greeted with inaccessibility and of having to make complaint and speak to supervisors and write letters to general managers.

But, then.

I think of the people I will see. The friendly faces that will greet me. I think of the conversations I will have and the laughter I will share. I think of the growing and learning and experiencing that comes with travel. I think of Tescos and Marks and Spencer, whose websites I've already poured over looking for Christmas gifts to pick up. I think of the pubs and all the veggie fare, I think of the Wetherspoons where we are going to lunch on our first day in London.

But, then.

I force myself to remember that my view of life, and of the future, depends entirely on focus. I can choose to look forward to the problems or look forward to the memories to be made and the experiences to be had. As a person who has a tendency towards depression, I have to sometimes put my expectations on elephant's feet so that I can see over the obstacles to what's truly important.

But, then.

I find that I'm growing excited about the trip.

13 comments:

  1. Good luck and enjoy and hope you continue to find the strength to deal with it all.

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  2. Dave, will you be in Ireland or Northern Ireland on your trip?

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  3. Jen, I haven't seen the agenda yet but I'm sure I'm not in Ireland, I've never been to Northern Ireland and would love to go ... but I'm guessing I'm not though I don't know for sure.

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  4. I love this: I have to sometimes put my expectations on elephant's feet so that I can see over the obstacles to what's truly important. That will be my mantra today!

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  5. Another way in which the famous elephant feet are helping...

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  6. Good luck on your trip, hope all goes well and you enjoy it, it's good to travel, meeting new places and friendly people is always nice and the work you do is amazing.

    I do understand your frustration and concerns,I rarely go out because of the lack of accessibility, not the same kind of accessibility a person in a wheelchair needs but the sensory friendly type, unfortunately no one considers that something like putting music and televisions everywhere are a problem of lack of accessibility, even when I explain people don't believe it. It's kind of sad that most places I can get in my wheelchair I can't get in because of the sounds.

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  7. Hope you have a trip free trip.
    Is there somewhere we can find out if you are doing any turn up on the day to hear the talk? I had a look on line but I can’t find info, maybe I’m not searching efficiently.

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  8. Have a wonderful and FULLY ACCESSIBLE trip. And happy shopping over there. Say hi to Tesco's for me...

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  9. Welcome to the UK :)

    Question. I understand why it's possible to get excited about Marks and Spencer. But Tesco? Lower-mid-range moderately evil supermarket Tesco?

    Am I not seeing the wood for the trees here?

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  10. I too shiver at the thought of travel - some for the anticipation of new places and people, and some shivers for the "fears" that it won't go well. It seems no matter how well you plan, what words you say - there are still those than interpret things different. Let's hope the biggest problems will be what to eat and what to buy.:-) Have fun - you both certainly deserve a bit of fun!

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  11. Dave Hingsburger10 October 2012 at 09:21

    Mary, I confess to loving Tescos as a place to shop. It's easily accessible, crammed with stuff, and has terrific veggie food in the cafe for a really reasonable price. Their clothes are terrific, we get lot of stuff for the kids there, Joe too wears Tesco fashions ... and who doesn't love the ladybug cloth bags?

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  12. Ah, the Tesco cafe. I get your point on that one - in fact when I visit my parents I tend to stay in the nearby Travelodge and take great comfort in the breakfasts at the Tesco next door. It doesn't pretend to be anything it's not.

    I'm a Sainsburys girl myself for the clothes and groceries, but their attached cafe is a Starbucks and I think it's possible to spend more on a snack lunch in Starbucks than on the whole week's shopping in the store.

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  13. Hi Dave

    Tesco's profits have dipped for the first time in 18 years. Watch your plastic!!!

    Everytime I see those flashing ladybird cloth bags I think of you!!

    Have a safe trip and see you soon

    Mark

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