My wheelchair is feeling better.
Really.
Much better.
On my way home on Friday, from work, I was in the lobby of the apartment building waiting for an elevator. I was struck by a fit of coughing. Two youngish people were behind me, one said to the other, 'That wheelchair has a horrible cough.'
I wasn't feeling good, and that means my defences were down, and that means that things can easily piss me off. I sat there trying to think of something to say - educational and funny. Nothing came.
Except the elevator.
We all got on.
Just as the door closed, I looked up at one of those fresh young faces and said, 'You'd better stand back, because not only does my wheelchair have a bad cough, it's got the shits too.'
I smiled.
They looked horrified.
Sometimes I want to educate.
Sometimes I don't.
Love your sense of humor Dave, even when sick. Not easy to do. Admire your dedication to your education of others - would be a lot easier to climb into bed and pull the covers over your head. Keep on rolling!
ReplyDeleteSad that you would even have say something about comments - but just another commentary on the lack of respect so common today. I hope it helps - or at least makes others aware that it will not be tolerated.
Love it.....does your wheelchair use 2 ply toilet tissue or one?! Education can sometimes take various forms....hopefully, they got it....if not, whew, you made me laugh so much I woke my family this morning!!
ReplyDeleteSo funny love it Dave. oh and does your wheelchair scrunch or fold the toilet paper.
ReplyDeleteah I needed that laugh today! :)
Great response! Hope they learned something ...
ReplyDeleteToo funny Dave!
ReplyDeleteHighly appropriate! (on your part, not theirs)
ReplyDeleteLOL Dave! That was a great laugh for me first thing in the morning. And don't think you didn't educate them - They will probably remember that a lot longer than if you had of been more sedate! Maybe they will think twice the next time!
ReplyDeletethat was great
ReplyDeleteThere are times when I wish I were, not just a "fly on the wall" but a TELEPATHIC fly on the wall. You know. Not only able to witness events like this one but also able to peer into the heads of the people you were talking to so I can see what they were thinking at that moment!
ReplyDeleteAndrea S.
That was the perfect response. You did educate.
ReplyDeleteLOL That was great. Never miss an opportunity to "educate".
ReplyDeleteAwesome response. Maybe you underestimate "interesting" replies.
ReplyDeleteWheelchair with the shits, hm? I'm not so much concerned with the toilet paper, but rather the implications of wheelchairs having a digestive system: what do wheelchairs eat?! I had always thought our relationships to them were symbiotic (though perhaps with slight reluctance at first). Was I wrong? Are they parasites? Heaven forfend! The only thing I know for sure is that they regularly graze clothing on racks at stores along with various bags that are hung on the backs of chairs. Might graze various shrubs and small trees. Perhaps it grazed some bad fruit?
In any case, I, for one, hope that wheelchairs don't have the taste for meat. Disturbing idea, if you think about it. Funny, but disturbing. Carnivorous wheelchairs. No wonder many people are uncomfortable when they're around -- wheelchair could be hungry. Mwa-ha-ha!
Very appropriate and educational, in my opinion....a perfect response, thanks for the chuckle.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you are feeling a bit better!
ReplyDeleteJulia
Beth --
ReplyDeleteI suspect that my wheelchair, at least, gets plenty to eat in the form of my dropped crumbs and bits. This thing has more crevices than I can even count.
;-)
LMAO!!!! Love this.
ReplyDeleteI love it when you out-smartass the smartasses. ;)
ReplyDeletebhahahahaha awesome response
ReplyDeleteHi Dave I Love your sense of humor and I loved it when I listened to you in Thunder Bay. I like the way you dealt with that. I enjoy reading your inspirational thoughts. Take Care.
ReplyDeleteBWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Go Dave!
ReplyDeleteI bet they don't forget that one!