OK

Heaven knows that I, amongst men, should believe in fairy dust.

Amid stress, anxiety and worry, we were calling to set up a Christmas get together with Mike, Marissa and the kids. We're doing something a little different, a little special this year, and it takes some organization. Joe, growing a little tired of my being distracted by roiling inner waters, said, 'Why not call Mike or Marissa and see if you can get all the planning done.'

I did what he said a little annoyed that he was asking me to do something while I was in the mud bath of self loathing, I picked up the phone. I chatted with Mike and we got a date. Step one, tick. Then I outlined the plan and contingency, all agreed. Step two, tick. I heard Ruby in the background and asked if she'd come to talk. She eagerly agreed. She loves chatting on the phone.

She came on the phone full of her day at school. They had had a gift fair in the gymnasium and all gifts were 50 cents. She bought a gift for her mommy and daddy and Sadie. She wouldn't tell me what the gifts were because everyone could hear her and the secret would be out. OK, I got that.

Talking with Mike later he made reference to Ruby's great day at school and her coming home with gifts that had been wrapped by the teachers.

A howl went up in the living room. It was Ruby raising her voice in protest. I could hear her all the way from her apartment in Ottawa to our car in Toronto.

'Dad! The teachers did not wrap the presents!!!!'

Mike turned from the phone and I heard him ask her, 'Who wrapped the presents then.'

A firm little voice said, 'Elves.'

I had wanted to cry all afternoon. And I did, I laughed so hard that the tears that had begun their journey in sadness now made rainbows in my eyes.

I live in a world populated by Elves.

All is OK.