Tuesday, July 06, 2010

A Huge Compliment

Ruby had finished her breakfast first and was beginning to get tired of us adults actually chewing our food. I knew that she loved riding around on my chair so I offered her a spin through the lobby of the hotel. She climbed up on my stomach, the softest seat in the house, and off we went. I put my arm around her so that she was safely and firmly seated. She wasn't going to get hurt on my watch.

The hotel was full of people in town for the various celebrations, primarily Pride. A woman watched us swoop by. She had that lovely smile that adults get when watching children have fun, part whimsy, part envy, all pleased. On one of our pass-bys, she said, 'It looks like she's quite secure in your arm.' I said, 'Whatever else, I want her to be safe.'

Then something wonderful happened. The woman said, quite seriously, 'You've spent your whole life making sure people are safe haven't you.' I came to a sudden halt and said, 'Pardon me?' She said, 'I know who you are, I know what you do.' Then she talked about the effect that some of my work had had on her and on the field.

I drove away and Ruby said, 'That was a nice lady ...' there hung a pause in the air. 'And ...' I said. She said, 'You should never talk to strangers.'

I gave her a hug and said 'That's right kiddo, that's right.'

Afterwards, whenever I thought of our brief meeting, our little conversation, I got tears in my eyes. I figure if that's how I'll be remembered. I'm really OK with that.

Really.

11 comments:

  1. what a lovely little moment to tuck away and take out again on a future rainy day to remember. I agree, it's a good way to be remembered by.

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  2. Susan, Mum to Molly6 July 2010 at 09:18

    Absolutely splendid.

    Many of us think of you in that way Dave, and always will...

    ... even if we never get to meet you in person.

    Susan in Sydney

    PS: You're still welcome downunder anytime!

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  3. I just wanted to say what an impact you and your wise words have had on my world. I'm a mom to a little boy who has a MR/DD diagnosis. Most of the time we live our life and love our boy and move on making our memories paying those 4 letters little mind. But then we are somewhere and someone notices that our Seth isn't the same, doesn't do things the "right" way and is unkind, then there it is and we remember. My mama's heart breaks because someone doesn't see what an amazing kid he is, they only see that label. Reading your words and your fight to make people SEE makes me proud to be a part of it all and worry a little less of what will become of my little boy in the world. Thank you all the way from Kansas for making sure they are all safe.

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  4. How sweet and wonderful is that?

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  5. Not only Sweet, but well deserved!!!

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  6. Dave, I'm a pediatrician who stumbled across your website and have been a fan ever since. I can't tell you how often I think about you and your work, whether in the language (and topics) I use with the people I work for or in behind-the-scenes stuff: at lectures, teaching medical students, challenging those hidden assumptions behind policy decisions.

    "What would Dave have to say about that?" It's a great question. Just recently we were talking with medical students about NICU patient followups, and someone mentioned that there is a lot of physical an cognitive disability that doesn't show up until they are well out of the ICU and into toddlerhood. [i]And ...? So ...?[/i] I never miss a chance to point out that in assigning numbers to quality of life for iabled kids, they rank their own lives the highest, followed by parents, and followed last by physicians, who often haven't a clue what the quality of life is for anyone without an MD. We underestimate that for everyone, and when you are speaking so poorly for those who may have less-heard voices -- well, damn. That's really shameful, and really scary.

    Anyway, love having your voice in the back of my head pushing me on.

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  7. I'm truly delighted that someone got the opportunity to share with you what we all know. Your life's work is allowing us to endeavour to keep people safe. The people who we work for, the people who we live with, and the people who we cherish deserve this and you Dave, deserve immense praise.

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  8. I'm truly delighted that someone got the opportunity to share with you what we all know. Your life's work is allowing us to endeavour to keep people safe. The people who we work for, the people who we live with, and the people who we cherish deserve this and you Dave, deserve immense praise.

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  9. Apparently, I meant it truly enough to say it twice. Sorry!

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  10. That's a really lovely story! What a great thing to happen, especially during Pride. You are so lucky that you are so instantly recognizable to people, that you are so distinctive, like a celebrity! : ) Also, Ruby sounds like such a doll.

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  11. What a lovely tribute to you and everything you do...and Miss Ruby is one smart little girl.

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