We awake to a fresh fall of snow. And with it comes a sense that we need to tuck in, sip hot chocolate, and sit and talk of happy times past. Joe and I have not documented our livies in pictures, we have stories to tell - and some of those stories are down to a couple of words 'balsamic vinegar' and 'pink sunglasses' are two of our recent favourites, we need no more than those words, each understands the entire context, each sees the same picture, each cherishes the moment.
Right now, for reasons I'm not quite ready to share here on the blog, we are both steeped in memory and are trying to figure how to honour someone who's had a powerful role in our lives. We want her to know, we believe she does, but don't want to make it seem like we are praising in anticipating her death. We are, we are, but not now, not yet. She feels she is a burden to us. She's not. Not ever.
So we tell stories, she knows some short forms too, 'it took longer to read the paper' that story brings us to tears of laughter, then there's the 'I am not a prostitute' and 'longer than the drive to Georgeville' - those you gotta be little more careful with. But we all know them all, long version and short version.
I have always been lucky to have, in my life, someone older, someone wiser, who chose to love me. I have always been lucky to have someone in my life who sees my valuve - when others don't. I can face a million based on the faith of 'one' and as it's been proven, millions more with just 'two'.
We are aware that we are going to be left again, soon.
But since she is MINE, she always will have a bit of real estate, a summer cabin, build on the plains of my heart, for the days when heaven's too breezy.
Your last paragraph is a lovely way to think of someone important who has gone on.
ReplyDeleteWe are aware that we are going to be left again, soon.
ReplyDeleteBut since she is MINE, she always will have a bit of real estate, a summer cabin, build on the plains of my heart, for the days when heaven's too breezy.
Oh my, I just love this way of thinking. I'm sure your friend knows how special you think she is.
Enjoy your last physical times together, so often death comes too quickly.
ReplyDeleteWe are not "Material" people and often find those who have past on have left us memories through which they live on or are still with us in unexpected moments.
ReplyDeleteSieze the moments cherish the memories and store them away for future needs
Dave, I have made a few of these as Christmas gifts this year - a "Journal in a Jar." Its basically a list of questions that are put into a jar on little slips of paper, allowing the person to pull one every day, or every few days, and then journal about the question on the paper.
ReplyDeleteHere is a link to suggestions for questions. Everyone should do this - we all carry stories in our souls that will never be told again unless we get them down for the next generations...
http://www.debtproofliving.com/Articles/ViewArticle/tabid/179/smid/657/ArticleID/532102/Default.aspx
I think the recipient of this gift would be honoured to know she was so special to you.
I understand your need to make that deeper connection, to say what needs to be said, before...
ReplyDeleteMy father is in his 80's and has a weak heart. For some time now, I've been keenly aware that any early-morning/late-night phone call could be 'the one'. I, too, wanted to ensure that he knew what his influence in my life has meant to me, how the parts of me of which I am most proud, can in large portion be attributed to his love and guidance. But...I wanted to avoid the whole 'before you die...' feeling. So, since I have many health problems of my own, I wrote a letter from the standpoint of 'in case I have to leave...here's what I want you to know'. Not in those exact words, you understand, but with that general feeling. I don't know if this approach would be valid for you to use, but it's what I did, so I throw it out there for your consideration.
What a day we Torontonians had, huh? Hope you and Joe and tucked in nice and warm tonight!