Panic.
A loss of breath blurred my vision. Oh, no. Oh, God. What's gone wrong now? How do I tell poor Joe? We were both talking about how everything was going smoothly and we'd both been feeling so well. Ah, the aches, the pains, but typical stuff. In the right light, funny stuff. After a couple bouts of serious illness in the past, I delight in simple small stuff.
But, what is this. I can see it's like a big bloody wound, or is is a blister. Right on my shoulder. Oh, my God. What is it?
Last time I diagnosed by computer I got it so wrong that I ended up delaying making the right decision to go to the doctor - which turned out to be a very wrong decision. Joe's wandering around the room as I'm writing this and he hasn't seemed to notice. I figure I'll leave it until I get into the bathroom and check the mirror in there. I'll have more privacy.
Before I have a chance to get up Joe, voice filled with disgust, says, 'What is that?' He heads towards me and then past me. He grabs a Kleenex from the box on the desk and wipes at the mirror removing some lipstick. A wound size kiss had been discolouring my shoulder.
Ha, ha, God.
Ha. Freaking, Ha.
gotta love Joe!
ReplyDeletetoo funny!
ReplyDeleteReminds me of a story a friend told years ago when she was convinced she had gangrene or similar because her arms suddenly and inexplicably turned black. Medical professionals were mystified until someone grabbed a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a cotton ball and wiped her arm. Off came the black. Turned out the dye in her new long-sleeved shirt was rubbing off on her skin. Always a relief when things are NOT as bad as they initially seem!
ReplyDeleteQuestion is... who the heck has been making out with your mirror? :)
ReplyDeleteSimilar experience when DD was 4 and daycare called to report blood in urine and wanted her rushed to hospital right away. Turns out that red play-dough will do that to ya.
What a cute and funny post!!
ReplyDeleteICLW
ROTFLMAO!!!! Classic!
ReplyDeleteHilarious! lol
ReplyDeleteOMG, so funny. I once freaked out when a kid I was taking care of had neon green poop. Turns out eating half a box of Fruit Loops will do that to you.
ReplyDeleteThat is hysterical. But I thought the same thing: Who the hell is making out with the mirror? You and Joe don't seem like the types to wear lip gloss, but maybe I missed something! Glad it wasn't as bad as you thought. Maybe some new glasses?
ReplyDeleteBack in the really serious world of Scientific Research, some unamed Technicians were known to slip a certain dye into the drinks of newly employed Scientists to test the reactions to seeing their own Urine glowing flourescent in the toliet bowl.
ReplyDeleteAh well, time for a Serious Talk with Joe about the mirror! Or does he need to have a Serious Talk with you?
ReplyDeleteOh, my, I didn't make it clear that we were in a hotel room. I'm guessing someone, for fun, leaned over the desk and left a kiss mark on the mirror. It would be near impossible for Joe to find gloss that goes with his stash.
ReplyDeleteHotel room... riiiiiight... sure Dave, if you say so.... har har har har har har. Thanks for the laffs yesterday!
ReplyDelete