I'm getting old.
I really feel that today.
Still fighting jet lag, coming down with a cold.
I find that while my body doesn't bend like it used to - my will bends more than it should.
I find that while my muscles have gone soft - my attitudes have hardened.
I find that while my flesh is willing - my spirit is weak.
I'm heading for a pity party. And I don't care what all the self help books say, I like them. I like them so much that I won't share them with anyone. My pity party is for me. I invite only me. It's all about me.
"And what would he like?" Joe and I were out for breakfast and the waitress, after taking Joe's order asked him what I wanted. I was on the slide to the pity pool so I just wave to Joe to go ahead and give my order. I like victimhood too much some times.
An advert on the television for a movie coming out uses the word 'Retard' in the promo. I shudder at the incredible insensitivity of people. What the hell is going on in their minds? Haven't we convinced anyone but ourselves about name calling. I feel like giving up, giving in, spilling milk and crying over it.
Four disabled parking places are taken. No one in the frigging store even LIMPS. We had to park several spaces away. I could hear Joe's breath behind me as he helped push me up a slight incline and into the store. I feel like getting on the intercom and calling out all the blue badge abusing bastards. But I don't. I roll around glaring at anyone who establishes eye contact. I'm heading for a mean mood. I need to take a mudbath in depression.
It's hard not to just throw in the towel.
Say, "To hell with it."
Become a telemarketer.
When I was younger, in my teens, these parties could last for weeks. I had the luxury of self induglence.
But I'm old now. I have to get it all in today because tomorrow's a busy day. I have things to do.
I'll have to do some mental stretches so I don't pull a mind muscle.
I'll have to moisturize my attitudes to keep them soft to the touch.
I'll have to clean up from the pity party - put the sugar free chocolate syrup back in the pantry, the no carb cake in the fridge and the fat free ice cream in the freezer - so there's room for more than just me in my heart.
Because if I let 'me' get in the way of the 'you' that I serve, that would truly be a pity.
Well you started my day with a smile at your ability to laugh at yourself while denigrating the blue badge abusing blackguards :)and you gave me more phrases to think about than any writer has the right to throw at the world in one piece of writing in one day!
ReplyDeleteI liked the thought of moisturizing my attitude to keep it soft to the touch.
I'll be praying for an infusion of energy to fight off that nasty cold. Rest helps too--don't leave all the work to God. :)
Hi Dave
ReplyDeleteFantastic to see i'm not the only miserable sod! I would have to point out though that of course not everyone with a blue badge has a visible disability - my wife and i often get dirty looks from people when parking who fail to realise she is seriously visually impaired because she just gets on with things and doens;t conform to the stereotype of disability. That gets me having one of those days!
I'll second scfinlayson with the visible disability issue. If I am using my cane and use the blue badge, no problem (once they see the cane that is).
ReplyDeleteAs it is, before I even get out of my car, I get glares and people cussing me out because of course, I'm "too young" to need a blue badge. Heaven forbid I don't use my cane. Even the limp isn't enough for most people.
I'll echo the two commenting above me... I've known people that aren't mobility-impaired but do have major internal heart-lung disabilities that either will or already have made them use disabled parking. I would certainly consider "life endangerment" to be about the best argument for a parking space I can think of.
ReplyDeleteDave, Dave, Dave,
ReplyDeletesorry I missed your pity party - sounds like it was all it was cracked up to be!
But do moisturize away and tell me one thing - where do you come up with putting all those words together and making them sound like there could be music in the back ground?!?
Seriously, I could hear the theme music in the background - I'll tell you what it was later.
And which add, for which movie - I again cannot recall hearing that - do I miss everything - I'll try to watch tv today to see if I can catch that.