tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post3658884773418270672..comments2024-03-19T07:36:33.915-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: A Creaky DoorDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-9944583370012874392011-06-20T11:38:34.377-04:002011-06-20T11:38:34.377-04:00I am a support worker to some adults who have inte...I am a support worker to some adults who have intellectual disabilities, recently the elderly mother of one of the men died, I spent time sitting with him after he heard the news, he said to me" I feel sad I think I feel like crying but I dont know how". Because this man has lived in institutionalised care for most of his life, he has learned to suppress his feelings to this extent, it made me feel very sad and really heightened my awareness of tuning in to people's actions and body language more. Often when people are labelled as having challenging behaviour it is because it is the only means they have of expressing themselves.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-56188990696638656242011-03-31T23:34:56.626-04:002011-03-31T23:34:56.626-04:00Susan asked me several times today if I had "...Susan asked me several times today if I had "read Dave's blog yet?" Finally, very late, here I am. And it was like waiting for a really good dessert at the end of the day and finding it was every bit as good as I was imagining.<br /><br />People's feelings aren't acknowledged enough and people's words aren't heard enough. That's true even in the non-disability world, but it is magnified many times for people with disabilities. A short time ago someone we support who is also a friend, read through a booklet our agency had written in plain language to welcome them to the agency. She said, "It doesn't say what to do when you try to tell someone something is wrong and they won't listen." We had the "lines of communication" outlined but not what to do if they broke down along the way. I passed along her concern but I'm still not sure we've addressed it well enough. This post makes me realize I have to make sure her message gets through and makes a difference.Belindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09251920708783268740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-34391137476825652952011-03-31T21:06:22.810-04:002011-03-31T21:06:22.810-04:00Anyone who can or has continued to live life feeli...Anyone who can or has continued to live life feeling completely unloved is a much stronger person then I. I cannot even imagine how he must feel or how he has survived. Even if he never finds a sensual love that includes intimate holding and kissing, I pray he someday feels a warm and comfortable love.Kasiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17813617826032990730noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-22151071565492335482011-03-31T20:04:00.716-04:002011-03-31T20:04:00.716-04:00Wow!
I can't think of what to say that doesn&#...Wow!<br />I can't think of what to say that doesn't sound trite :/<br />Great post again Dave.Noisyworldnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-81968589344675401072011-03-31T17:39:27.986-04:002011-03-31T17:39:27.986-04:00When I am working with my middle school students a...When I am working with my middle school students as a speech therapist, I try to let them know that it is okay to be mad or sad, and to express that with words. I think that sometimes people with disabilities who have trouble expressing their anger and are rebuked for physically lashing out or screaming start to think that anger is wrong. They have trouble separating their inappropriate reaction (such as screaming right in someone's face) from the appropriate emotion(being mad because a math problem was done incorrectly). Do you see that with adults?little.birdyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07156310917613899680noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-69238425630084147252011-03-31T17:09:13.634-04:002011-03-31T17:09:13.634-04:00One of the battles I think still to be one is the ...One of the battles I think still to be one is the acknowledgement that people with disabilities (and for some reason down syndrome in particular) are allowed to feel grief at the loss of a loved one.I've never known how to adequately push families,often when experiencing grief themselves, to realise their relative is allowed to grief, they do understand and feel and sometimes to push to let them go to the funeral.Myrriennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-32783469897046120442011-03-31T15:03:58.691-04:002011-03-31T15:03:58.691-04:00Dave,
As one of my fave authors says. "My hea...Dave,<br />As one of my fave authors says. "My heart is too full for words." I am honored to read this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-57478948094817346962011-03-31T14:28:20.188-04:002011-03-31T14:28:20.188-04:00Dave, you write with such power and beauty. I am ...Dave, you write with such power and beauty. I am thankful that your voice is part of my daily routine. I so wish I could participate in one of your trainings. We really have nothing like it for those living in this area with disabilities. If only we could clone you and you could teach us all how to lead such an open and healing experience for those in support. Thank you again.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-85603655824749567302011-03-31T13:46:21.662-04:002011-03-31T13:46:21.662-04:00Again,
Thank you, Dave.
I read every day, I nee...Again, <br /><br />Thank you, Dave.<br /><br />I read every day, I need to let you know that.AkMomnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-1486060337399473522011-03-31T10:31:52.873-04:002011-03-31T10:31:52.873-04:00thanks, dave.thanks, dave.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-88840051337789551722011-03-31T09:32:52.638-04:002011-03-31T09:32:52.638-04:00Dave,
I visit your blog frequently, and find many...Dave, <br />I visit your blog frequently, and find many valuable "tidbits" to take with me. I just want to comment on the 'look' of your blog, for the lack of a better word. Sometimes I find all the graphics and colours very distracting. I don't have a visual impairment, but I imagine that someone who does may have a difficult time reading what you have to say.<br />Also, having your considered changing to the Verdana font (if possible)? It was designed to be easy to read, especially for someone with difficulties with their vision.<br />Keep up the good fight!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-64085775555605749652011-03-31T08:44:24.438-04:002011-03-31T08:44:24.438-04:00This is a wonderful post. I have a feeling I'l...This is a wonderful post. I have a feeling I'll be referring people to this one in the future.ivanovahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13694244417925801824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-25413446697245880612011-03-31T08:33:56.055-04:002011-03-31T08:33:56.055-04:00This is a very important post. Thank you.This is a very important post. Thank you.Ellennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-1266284779829350792011-03-31T07:44:11.005-04:002011-03-31T07:44:11.005-04:00There's a lot in what you've written today...There's a lot in what you've written today, Dave.<br /><br />I'm learning that three of the most powerful words in the English language are:<br /><br />"I get it." <br /><br />To let someone know that you are listening and trying very hard to understand, acknowledge, and affirm their feelings is one of the most therapeutic things we can ever do - whether in our personal life or elsewhere. <br /><br />People who deny the feelings of those with developmental disabilities would be able to eliminate the need for a lot of "behaviour management" if they just made an effort to really listen, acknowledge, and affirm the feelings of their fellow human beings. It's simple respect. And it doesn't take much... <br /><br />I hope he finds love too. But if he doesn't, he feels comforted and reassured because someone respectfully chose to "get it". I'm so glad he had such a safe place to express his feelings.Susanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12527926041729913404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-56134355079956115762011-03-31T05:45:02.140-04:002011-03-31T05:45:02.140-04:00Another post that has brought a tear to my eye. I ...Another post that has brought a tear to my eye. I can only echo CL though. Just heartbreaking.Faerynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-55506548025752971672011-03-31T05:21:10.585-04:002011-03-31T05:21:10.585-04:00I never realised that before re. the denial of emo...I never realised that before re. the denial of emotions - how startling and abusive and awfulJoyfulgirlnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-76789337409761756842011-03-31T03:08:11.228-04:002011-03-31T03:08:11.228-04:00thank youthank youtekealhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06624164330376848455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-13470445911304764132011-03-31T02:28:11.563-04:002011-03-31T02:28:11.563-04:00I remember someone saying, 'listenning is a su...I remember someone saying, 'listenning is a subversive act'......How important it is to create space for others to talk and then to listen.theknappernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-13413717839049752322011-03-31T02:05:56.118-04:002011-03-31T02:05:56.118-04:00Oh, wow. I don't even know what to say. Jus...Oh, wow. I don't even know what to say. Just heartbreaking.CLnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-49017682470408082822011-03-31T02:05:08.609-04:002011-03-31T02:05:08.609-04:00What an incredible post Dave. That last paragraph ...What an incredible post Dave. That last paragraph really touched me. I hope and pray he experiences that lovely surprise sometime soon.Kristinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10791317184998122691noreply@blogger.com