tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post805225904819499786..comments2024-03-19T07:36:33.915-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: Wishing To Be Who I Could Have Been But Wasn'tDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-67432819975744838162019-01-13T14:56:44.724-05:002019-01-13T14:56:44.724-05:00I don't think anyone should let someone else i...I don't think anyone should let someone else insult them because the person has a disability. Honestly, it's insulting to think that people with disabilities will naturally act like that and aren't responsible for it.Amanda Foresthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04200794053287551087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-24854255889965954782019-01-08T15:30:37.521-05:002019-01-08T15:30:37.521-05:00A few years ago I adopted a motto that has helped ...A few years ago I adopted a motto that has helped me in situations like this - "do no harm, take no shit." Now whenever I get frustrated I try and find a way to stand up for myself in a kind way. I still fail as much as I succeed but that little phrase often helps me figure it out. (I actually wear it as morse code on a necklace to remind me.) May we both find that balance. Jasminehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02516367062765556673noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-65866584756312658492019-01-08T04:55:01.733-05:002019-01-08T04:55:01.733-05:00There is literally nothing else you could have don...There is literally nothing else you could have done in either situation. It sounds like you were quite polite to the autistic guy. Speaking as someone with autism, I think I can say that. He still needs to know when his behavior is out of line, just like everyone else.<br /><br />I was lightly insulted by a woman who I knew was ID in the library today. I clarified what she was saying, and then politely but firmly let her know she was wrong. I was confused and stunned, but treated the situation calmly, politely, but firmly, just as you did.<br /><br />We ALL deserve our boundaries. Both to pee and to not be verbally assaulted.<br /><br />Doing it politely is key. You succeeded in that.Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04931944728963114472noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-68670130235514141632019-01-07T05:00:25.138-05:002019-01-07T05:00:25.138-05:00I know I'm getting to this a bit late....
Rem...I know I'm getting to this a bit late....<br /><br />Remember (I say this because I struggle with it so very much) that one of the people who's entitled to your kindness and generosity of spirit is you.<br /><br />It's often uncomfortable, and I know that I personally would rather be compassionate than angry. But I'm learning that if I would be angry on someone else's behalf because of an injustice, it's okay to be angry on my own behalf. I have to be as compassionate with myself as I would be with others.<br /><br />If any of your students, or attendees at conferences where you've spoken, had described one of these situations, I would hope you'd tell them that while they're not entitled to be cruel, they're entitled to be angry.<br /><br />You're entitled to your anger. When you are hurt, when you are forced to fight for space that was designed for you, you, too, are entitled to be angry.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15678339543173979175noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-29384932319026868282019-01-03T11:28:03.435-05:002019-01-03T11:28:03.435-05:00The young man with autism - my impression is that ...The young man with autism - my impression is that he knew what he was saying was hurtful. He has not ever spoken to you. or apparently even exchanged non verbal communication (smile, nod, stare, etc) when he is with staff. It sounds as if you were targeted and he intended to hurt your feelings. That is bullying, and it is not OK. I don't know that your behavior was inappropriate or that you lacked patience with him. You treated him the way you would a rude stranger. Which he was. <br />(And as his staff don't model respectful boundaries and demonstrate that it is ok to talk about someone's private business in public places, that may be a factor but it is not YOUR job to fix it. ) <br /><br />The homeless man in the stall - kinda seems that the security staff should be more effective in ensuring that the stalls remain available for their intended use. But hard to see any solutions. <br />clairesmumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12235828110880302069noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-72795550413347944552019-01-03T02:00:42.621-05:002019-01-03T02:00:42.621-05:00This is such an accurate description of what I fee...This is such an accurate description of what I feel so many times. I have a lot of understanding for people who "don't know any better and don't mean it n a bad way". Or for people who "Might have their own valid reasons to use this or that accessible facility".<br />But...what about people understanding <i>my</i> need for accessible spaces. <i>My</i> feelings about the hundredth time I can't get into a store or bathroom because it's not accessible?<br />We always try to not let it bother us but at some point you're just tired and not feeling like being understanding...Martijnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00118583971352904469noreply@blogger.com