tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post7511427201207471043..comments2024-03-29T03:43:45.977-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: Not YetDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-19584045004762528572017-04-28T16:59:09.810-04:002017-04-28T16:59:09.810-04:00Thanks, Dave. I have a cousin -- my father's ...Thanks, Dave. I have a cousin -- my father's first cousin -- with a very mild intellectual disability who today would have gone to college, I'm sure, and been on her own from a young age. As it was, however, being born in the 1920s/30s (I'm not sure of her exact age), she lived a life that was a pale shadow. She stayed home. She never went to school. She didn't learn to read. She of course didn't learn to drive. She never managed her own money. Basically, she did what her mother told her, whixh was nothing much. <br /><br />And then her mother died. And her sister tried to take over their mother's former job by moving her into her home in a town about 30 miles away -- but my cousin declared her independence. She moved back to the city she'd always lived in, got her own apartment, chose her own furniture, decided what church she'd go to, and the folks at the church, seeing her great untapped potential, helped her learn to read. With the help of an accountant, she manages her own money and balances her checkbook. She travels with families from the church. She discovered just what she'd been missing all those years, and she lives a happy and busy life today. <br /><br />The next time I saw her after her mother's death, I was her houseguest for several days. She was a perfect hostess. She shared her home and her very full and active life with me. I'm *incredibly* thrilled at what she's done with her own life, after 60 years of being a hanger-on! I hope her sister is, too. I do know that she has so many friends and activities now, her sister has to book her in advance for holidays. :) I had always felt pity for her -- but no longer! <br /><br />I wonder how many other people with mild intellectual disabilities like hers have spent a wasted life over the years at home, doing nothing. It's terrible what we've done to so many people out of "kindness." I'm sure my cousin's mom meant well; but people who mean well often do more harm than people who set out to do harm in the first place, I think!Emily and Laurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14421526181503946143noreply@blogger.com