tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post6308642413114161212..comments2024-03-29T03:43:45.977-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: Answering The CallDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-87201166966265013602011-10-03T12:11:03.936-04:002011-10-03T12:11:03.936-04:00Reading this blog has helped me a lot
thank xenica...Reading this blog has helped me a lot<br />thank <a href="http://www.wl-pills.com/" rel="nofollow">xenical 120mg</a> u very muchDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06612942774591788412noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-54986981176873650402011-10-03T00:31:00.078-04:002011-10-03T00:31:00.078-04:00I am impressed with her courage and with the grace...I am impressed with her courage and with the grace you both showed during that conversation.Kristinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10791317184998122691noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-18710430825907013392011-10-02T02:00:42.740-04:002011-10-02T02:00:42.740-04:00Thank you for the follow up. I hope the woman you...Thank you for the follow up. I hope the woman you wrote about is able to read the comments today and see that her phoning you and her willingness to have a real conversation is what makes the difference. This is what the concept of retribution is all about....to make ammends, take responsibility and to make different decisions in the present and future. She had taken a big step down on the ethics ladder and now has been able to take a step up.I honour her for contacting you and honour you for your openness to have an honest and compassionate conversation.I suspect all of us here have not always acted as respectfully as we could. I know I have made my mistakes. Thank you again.theknappernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-37787712898269558272011-10-01T23:03:50.544-04:002011-10-01T23:03:50.544-04:00I appreciated that you stated in the original post...I appreciated that you stated in the original post, and restated in this one, your confession of using "that tone" yourself at times. We all prefer to be the ones noticing, being offended by, and decrying social injustice. It's much less fun to admit that we've all been guilty of feeling and acting "better" than someone else.<br /><br />I can admit it, but I don't like to. Being in a wheelchair all my life, I spent my K-12 years intentionally putting as much space between myself and the "special ed" kids as possible. I hated that people sometimes thought I was intellectually disabled, and didn't want to encourage such thoughts by association. I figured it was hard enough for me to fit in, be accepted, and respected. As an adult, I've made a lot of progress in that regard, but it's still not always easy or natural. I still find myself sometimes worrying too much about what people are thinking of me. <br /><br />Reading this blog has helped me a lot. Not just because I'll think, "What if a Dave were watching and judging me right now?," but also because it reminds me how many positive experiences you've had, and I've had, when taking the time to get to know and authentically communicate with people with intellectual and other disabilities. I'm monitoring myself for "bad behavior," but more importantly, I'm better recognizing opportunities for meaningful moments. :)Kristinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06868874343026873104noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-19571024015251292322011-10-01T22:31:31.231-04:002011-10-01T22:31:31.231-04:00I really liked Noisyworld's comment, and agree...I really liked Noisyworld's comment, and agree--that this woman had not only guts but also humility to read what you'd written yesterday, then call you.<br /><br />I didn't comment yesterday, but I was horrified at her comment. It seemed inappropriate for even a child because it was full of condescension. But almost immediately I identified things I've said to my own children, or the ways that I've said them, that were different but that I was still equally ashamed of. Recently I've been reading several different online conversations about disability awareness and advocacy and I can see just by reading (as well as my limited personal experience) how much I have to learn. In an ideal world, I feel, we acknowledge differences without feeling they make things lesser or uncomfortable, but in reality it is all too easy to act with privilege, or discomfort, or fear, etc. etc. Even the act of trying to do the right thing can in itself be offensive. I think you and your commenters are very right that this kind of incident is "above" very few of us. I will keep on trying.L.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-16006817600764234902011-10-01T21:08:48.824-04:002011-10-01T21:08:48.824-04:00CL, thank you. I also need to say that I find that...CL, thank you. I also need to say that I find that 'this little community,' as you called it, has had an impact on me, has influenced my thinking and informed my decisions. I think that sometimes the discussions here in the comment section are more important than the blog that inspired them. At times, I feel like I'm in a 'disabilities studies' class - right here. The blog is a means for me to 'think out loud' and to get feedback. I appreciate what you said and hope you feel my appreciation 'right back at ya!'Dave Hingsburgerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-8298010725155327382011-10-01T15:23:07.466-04:002011-10-01T15:23:07.466-04:00I'm really glad to hear how this turned out. ...I'm really glad to hear how this turned out. And I think it's important for us all to remember that we're all capable of similar behavior -- we all have our worst moments in whatever we do, and so we all have room to improve and grow.<br /><br />And as a general comment, I just want to say how much I love your blog at times like these. I feel like you have inspired so many people to think about disability differently, and to be more aware of how their own behavior affects others. Just reading and participating in the little community has changed my attitudes and behavior in small but important ways, and this encounter is an example of the affect that these discussions have on readers.<br /><br />I have wondered, as people did in the previous thread, how it can be that you encounter readers of this blog who claim to love you but then treat you poorly in some way -- it has happened a few times, and it always makes me really sad. But I think it means we all have to remember that just reading this blog and agreeing with you isn't enough. We have to be consciously thinking about how we treat other people all the time. And I really do believe this blog is making a difference for many, many people.CLnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-79756314680123361422011-10-01T14:02:36.815-04:002011-10-01T14:02:36.815-04:00It took tons of guts for her to read the post and ...It took tons of guts for her to read the post and again try to atone for her words. This restores my faith in people a little morelillytigrenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-52250766718092036992011-10-01T10:49:46.719-04:002011-10-01T10:49:46.719-04:00Thank you and thanks to her for sharing this very ...Thank you and thanks to her for sharing this very important conversation!<br />When given the opportunity we all become better people, don't we?Kasiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17813617826032990730noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-44213863996273481472011-10-01T10:34:00.932-04:002011-10-01T10:34:00.932-04:00Wow, that lady has guts and humility, too skills t...Wow, that lady has guts and humility, too skills that aren't easy to master, kudos to her and kudos to you Dave for handling it so sensitively :)Noisyworldnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-18718518396679612992011-10-01T10:14:06.626-04:002011-10-01T10:14:06.626-04:00This is a continuing step in that woman's life...This is a continuing step in that woman's life. She has shown she has courage and responsibility by her actions. If this was a learning experience for her and she takes these lessons and applys them she can become a caring and effective advocate. We all do things that are wrong in so many ways and when we get caught we have the choice of learning something and enhancing our lives or ignoring the issue. Hopefully she makes the first choice. Thank you Dave for two very thought provoking posts. It is also an opportunity to evaluate my interractions with the rest of humanity.Janhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14294417720384602202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-73925755239566785282011-10-01T09:44:00.302-04:002011-10-01T09:44:00.302-04:00It took great courage to do what she did, and I...It took great courage to do what she did, and I'm glad she found it. <br /><br />We all make many, many mistakes in this life. But it's owning up to them and learning from them that's important.<br /><br />I hope she can forgive herself, as you have forgiven her,and move forward. <br /><br />SueAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-85332481432603449102011-10-01T07:09:01.817-04:002011-10-01T07:09:01.817-04:00Yes. Our own unawareness, or over-concern with se...Yes. Our own unawareness, or over-concern with self, or under-concern with self or whatever it is in that moment is always there to catch all of us out - on either end of the power differential. Guilty, over and over again. (Less 'over and over again' as I go on, I hope.)<br /><br />It's never other than cringeworthy, and cruel. It does become useful when it's used.<br /><br />Sounds as though both of you handled that conversation with grace.Baba Yaganoreply@blogger.com