tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post5578751796354754429..comments2024-03-19T07:36:33.915-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: He's Missing!Dave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-20589452817090958612013-03-03T06:42:55.595-05:002013-03-03T06:42:55.595-05:00Stability and routine are important to everyone. T...Stability and routine are important to everyone. They're more important to people with certain brain problems. (I guess because when you have trouble figuring things out, the unpredictable can be overwhelming.) And they're more important the less control you have/the more vulnerable you are. Yeah, I daresay big changes (like in staff) can be <i>very</i> stressful for many of the people your organization serves.<br /><br />About your thinking Monday, I have questions for you. You mention "sudden and often unexplained loss[es]". Why not explain? And if you know beforehand, is there a reason not to, idk, have a going away party or something? And introduction to new staff (before and after they arrive, maybe)?<br /><br />***<br />On haircuts: I wasn't afraid of an unknown person cutting my hair until last time. The different stylist... well, she didn't understand basic geometry and saw fit disparage my "misunderstanding". (The length of the hair in front is the limiting factor when it comes to low pony tails.) She didn't listen to what I wanted, and so asked a nonsensical question in terms she wouldn't define. I did my best, trying to explain what I wanted in different terms. She kept repeating her nonsense-question and when I (as one with significant brain damage) had trouble being quick at answering, she'd demand answers even quicker, even after I'd explained the brain problems. At one point, a few seconds into me saying I needed a minute, she yelled at me that I was too angry and need to calm down. In the end, when Mom and I (her saying nothing I hadn't) got her to explain what she meant and understand what I wanted (that had little to do with that), she declared that no one cut hair like that and basically said I was lying that I'd had it cut that way there before.<br />At that point, the stylist in the next occupied chair quietly said she knew what I meant and she could do it. The second stylist was very understanding and even apologized to me on her co-worker's behalf. I got her card.<br />A couple weeks later, the lady who'd been getting her hair cut at the time saw me at the grocery store and had to say how awful it was and check up me.<br />I figure it's very unlikely to run into so bad a problem as that again, but I'm still afraid of it now.Bethnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-9554195171526248802013-03-02T12:25:22.354-05:002013-03-02T12:25:22.354-05:00As a person with very little energy, the thought o...As a person with very little energy, the thought of having to start over - with a new doctor, or physical therapist, or assistant - after I have invested so much irreplaceable energy into the previous person - is daunting.<br /><br />I haven't changed the doctor I really need to get away from - for that reason. I skipped PT appointments until 'my' PT came back from vacation. And I have done without the assistant who has been out for months for back surgery.<br /><br />Because of what it will cost ME.<br /><br />One of the many NOT fun parts of being disabled.<br /><br />The comment about having a person arrive and then see you naked ten minutes later really resonated. I'm not there yet - but I am NOT looking forward to it. And I perfectly understand people who get very agitated when this happens, even to the point of not letting the new person get near them.<br />ABEAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-43453937126320007452013-03-02T08:39:19.148-05:002013-03-02T08:39:19.148-05:00I have a combination of support staff via an agenc...I have a combination of support staff via an agency (for getting up and washed and dressed each weekday morning) and direct employees (for getting out and about). The agency is good and as far as possible ensures that I have the same person assisting me every day, barring sickness and holidays.<br /><br />My regular agency-assistant is leaving soon. As for most agency care staff, her T&Cs aren't great and part of this is a short notice period. I'm trying to get to grips with it, but I do feel very... unsettled.<br /><br />Strangely I haven't felt this unsettled when direct employees move on. I think in part this could be because of issues around control.<br /><br />If a direct employee gives notice or goes on maternity or long-term sickness leave, I'm still in control of the hiring procedures for their replacement. Yes, it's a pain in the bum to have to advertise and interview and whatnot, but I'm in control, and I pull in friend favours or use one-off support staff for going out and about in the meantime, or I can choose to cancel my plans.<br /><br />Whereas if a person who works via an agency goes... it's a bit of a lottery. I Do Not Know who is going to turn up on my doorstep on Monday morning and be seeing me naked ten minutes later. All I can do is hope I'm lucky again. And I can't choose to simply not wash and dress, nor is it a friend-favour kind of thing.Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11639094548415759560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-81194507150701867022013-03-02T07:17:23.541-05:002013-03-02T07:17:23.541-05:00I have a mental illness, and regularly see a psych...I have a mental illness, and regularly see a psychiatrist in the outpatient ward of the local psychiatric hospital. She's great, and I trust her. But when I started it was someone else, and because of staff changes and temporary replacement while a staff shortage problem was being solved, I had three different people within a bit over a year. And of course, when I had to come in an emergency or when I had to stay in the hospital, it was always someone else. Now, I've never had a bad experience with the therapists working at that hospital, and I've gotten somewhat used to having a stranger in front of me and having to explain them my situation so they could help me. And still, every time, when take that big breath before starting to talk, I have the feeling that I'm jumping over my shadow. So I believe I can imagine to some extent what getting new support staff must be like.Lounahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11031075401203936622noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-12585561238243846732013-03-02T06:01:21.308-05:002013-03-02T06:01:21.308-05:00Nobody touches my hair but Jamie. That's how ...Nobody touches my hair but Jamie. That's how it's been for over ten years and that's how it will stay until one or the other of us dies - if I can help it.<br /><br />Very interesting how you tied that to staff changes for people who are supported... There is a lot that can be done to be more sensitive to these kinds of changes... to better support people through them, and to minimize them if at all possible...Susanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12527926041729913404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-73432810444224847882013-03-02T05:20:43.210-05:002013-03-02T05:20:43.210-05:00The loss of MY Barber was a severe blow indeed. B...The loss of MY Barber was a severe blow indeed. Because he was my Father. In a small country town in South Australia he had been the barber for over 40 years and when he retired he set the chair up in the garage at home. His old and I do mean old, customers still came to sit in his chair looking out over the car and chat while they had their hair cut.<br /><br />Dad always cut my hair and the payment I had to make was to sweep up the hair. One day in the shed barber shop he was brushing the loose hair off my face. This, for his family, was accompanied by a sharp hard blow in the face. Which is of course the most efficient way to make sure it is all off.<br /><br />I was about 30 yrs old at the time. I had my eyes shut and suddenly there was a quick kiss planted on my lips by my dear Dad. He explained that I looked so much like my Mum and that was what he always did to her. I was of course delighted and my eyes fill with tears now as I write this.<br /><br />Both Dad and Mum have died now but they lived to old age and Dad only stopped cutting hair when his last customer died. <br /><br />I miss my Barber!Gleehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17671758996746410949noreply@blogger.com