tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post2513530309500893659..comments2024-03-19T07:36:33.915-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: Welcome HandsDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-65926618270830233432015-08-23T14:48:52.268-04:002015-08-23T14:48:52.268-04:00Thank you for this. I needed to her this.Thank you for this. I needed to her this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-33310833938331191882015-08-23T00:13:27.331-04:002015-08-23T00:13:27.331-04:00As I have said here, I am so glad to know I'm ...As I have said here, I am so glad to know I'm not the only one out here experiencing that type of thing. Every so often I do come into contact with someone who I can reach but there are so many others... Thanks, Dave, and commenters for helping to put it out there.B.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-19986529283151785222015-08-22T22:55:00.205-04:002015-08-22T22:55:00.205-04:00Good and accepting attitudes IS an art. I wish pe...Good and accepting attitudes IS an art. I wish people would look up "support" in the dictionary. It doesn't mean "doing me a begrudging favor". It really gets my goat when I've paid for a service. It shouldn't, but it does. I've been judged my whole life, and I should be paying to be so. You made some good points.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-31957103533345432192015-08-22T13:37:01.980-04:002015-08-22T13:37:01.980-04:00Yes, playground bullies grow up and look like adul...Yes, playground bullies grow up and look like adults. Human services does attract/enable too many of these folks to continue their mean behavior and allows them power over others...so they can abuse the power to satisfy their own need to be in control and 'make things right' (in their own twisted view). More education sometimes changes the behavior, sometimes not. <br />I have an 'invisible' disability so I can 'hide' my vulnerability somewhat when I have to rely on others. But my ability to trust that anyone REALLY cares and is safe is still quite tentative. <br />So I have my own prejudice that comes out as a porcupine-like reaction when I feel a threat - even when there is none. <br />It's hard to slow down moments of interaction so that I can stay balanced enough to protect myself but not be taken over by my own prejudices. <br />I'm not devaluing my own or anyone else's experience, but trying to focus on the parts I can change. <br />I also try to speak up against misuses of power when I can, and leading by example. <br />clairesmumnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-36877180431118301132015-08-22T11:39:29.860-04:002015-08-22T11:39:29.860-04:00Regarding support workers who are prejudiced again...Regarding support workers who are prejudiced against people with disabilities - I totally agree it happens. In fact, I think it happens more than we like to admit. I teach aspiring support workers. They come from a society steeped in prejudice. How can they not be prejudiced? The good ones accept that they carry prejudices and deal with it. Dave, someday I'd love to have a conversation with you about Suzy Sunshine - a monster full of prejudice.Colleennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-79569997130036836002015-08-22T09:28:04.507-04:002015-08-22T09:28:04.507-04:00We don't pay support people enough.
And we do...We don't pay support people enough.<br /><br />And we don't screen support people enough for competence AND attitude.<br /><br />As a society, we depend on caretakers, but don't value them, because 'anyone can do it.'<br /><br />The best we can hope for is to convert the ones who are incompetent but can learn and wish to be better into more competent ones, and remove the egregiously bad ones, but it is a HUGE problem, because the people getting the services are often not in a position to demand what they need.<br /><br />And it isn't going to get better if caregivers are treated like cogs.<br /><br />It makes me sad that someone like you, with the ability to control as much of his life as you are, STILL has these fears.<br /><br />Solutions? Well-supervised arrangements with a small group of consistent caregivers - if you can arrange it, need it, and can afford to pay for it.<br /><br />But what about those who can't?ABEhrhardthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17211038591900883672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-77908267771375708582015-08-22T09:00:57.913-04:002015-08-22T09:00:57.913-04:00Quote: What? Someone working with people with disa...Quote: <i>What? Someone working with people with disabilities who is prejudiced against people with disabilities? How can that be?</i><br /><br />Sadly, growing up with a disability all my life, I've found this to be all too common. Bullying is not exclusive to the confines of the playground or the corridors of high schools, and the attitudes and (maladaptive) coping skills of the bully don't magically melt away into nothingness when the bully reaches the legal age of adulthood.<br /><br />Working in the Disabled Services sector has many aspects that are appealing to those with a bullying tendency. They know that the job title on their business card is enough to earn them adulation from their community. They get near global reinforcement that their view of the world is the one true view (and this is precisely what bullies have been trying to prove to the world since they uttered their first insult in preschool). And more important, it puts them in position of control over other people -- so they don't need to resort to punching or name calling in order to shame another human being.<br /><br />That's why, like you, I am often on guard when I need help, and am grateful for true Human Grace of spirit, and that there are people who are drawn to service, because they believe serving others in ennobling rather than humilitating. Because it is.<br />CapriUnihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16906524679880178584noreply@blogger.com