tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post1389408360171102600..comments2024-03-29T03:43:45.977-04:00Comments on Of Battered Aspect: A Lesson 63 Years in the MakingDave Hingsburgerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11918601687946534172noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-22756530030227258542016-10-02T17:41:28.132-04:002016-10-02T17:41:28.132-04:00This brought tears to my eyes...sadness for you, a...This brought tears to my eyes...sadness for you, and for everyone else who has ever been made to feel like they are an inconvenience to others.. and fear that perhaps my son experiences this same thing but doesn't tell me. :( I know he did as a young child (a teacher said that his wheelchair was "inconvenient" for her...I went all Mama Bear on her and reminded her that his disability and all that it entails, including the attitudes of others, was FAR more "inconvenient" for him than it would ever be for her. <br /><br />My son tends to not speak out...and I will share your story with him in hopes that, should anyone treat him like he (and his wheelchair) are in the way, he will find his voice and roar. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06352332380562232996noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-49571840692447853052016-09-30T01:23:11.441-04:002016-09-30T01:23:11.441-04:00Dave, Thank you for sharing this. My heart is so v...Dave, Thank you for sharing this. My heart is so very happy for you. And hopeful for my own self & others who work on learning this lesson each and every day. God bless you, Dave. I am grateful for you.Purplettahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08534359464745707836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-6968159338152143802016-09-30T01:19:39.159-04:002016-09-30T01:19:39.159-04:00SammE, I second your admiration of Dave. However I...SammE, I second your admiration of Dave. However I am distressed by your question as to whether you would have been "chastised as the others were" if you had chosen to wait when following behind Dave, should that instead have been the circumstance. The term chastised implies the recipient of the correction has done something wrong. In the case of the scenario described it doesn't seem to me that the wrong-doing was that someone followed Dave up the ramp but rather that someone followed Dave up the ramp while making it abundantly clear in word and deed that the follower felt Dave was in the way, should hurry up, or should find help for himself. The follower *was wrong; that warranted censure. I am confident that had your scenario been the case, your appropriate and respectful sharing of space - with someone you see as an equal or in Dave's case someone you admire - would have been met with like respect.Purplettahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08534359464745707836noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-39346185125829876782016-09-29T18:03:41.574-04:002016-09-29T18:03:41.574-04:00Glad you have learned!
Or should I say I am glad...Glad you have learned! <br />Or should I say I am glad that you are learning as it never seems to end<br /><br />Each of us deserves our space whether physically or emotionally. Trying to claim mine each day while respecting the space and claim of each individual. Being the type of person I am I usually add the proviso that it is done politely -- no yelling, no pushing, no bullying, etc.Flemisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06071892012220547892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-35258208469685523532016-09-29T18:03:30.156-04:002016-09-29T18:03:30.156-04:00'One of them said that I should either hurry u...'One of them said that I should either hurry up or get help.'<br /><br />You had every right to be there. You weren't asking for anything - and were entitled to use the public path like anyone else.<br /><br />Those people could have said something like, "Excuse us," and gone around you. Or even, "We're going to go around you - is there anything you need?" if they wished to appear helpful (in case you wanted a door held or something).<br /><br />That would be appropriate.<br /><br />I hope you blasted them out of their complacency, self-centeredness, and complete lack of self-awareness. Maybe they'll think next time.<br /><br />"Excuse me? Who made you king of the world?" would be appropriate for you whenever you need it. Along with your best stare.ABEhrhardthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17211038591900883672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-8594285258433147662016-09-29T13:11:41.149-04:002016-09-29T13:11:41.149-04:00Hi Dave. I've been thinking about this post, a...Hi Dave. I've been thinking about this post, and what would happen if I were one of the people in your story today. Unless I were in a hurry for some reason, an appointment maybe, I would likely have just kept on following you through the door. I wouldn't have considered you as hindering my entry at all. Am I weird, or would I have been chastised as the others were if I had chosen to wait? <br /> I'm sorry you have had to deal with the treatment you write about today. I don't doubt it at all. Being a primary teacher, I certainly know how cruel children can be. Luckily for me, being that teacher has taught me a lot about people, and to see the person behind the difference whatever that might be. Not sure I'm being very clear. I am always interested in people, and your blog has been thought provoking always. Thank you for that, Dave. I admire you.SammEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10466808181268786245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-83110469298699840892016-09-29T10:30:22.109-04:002016-09-29T10:30:22.109-04:00Creating a safe space...how hard that is, for thos...Creating a safe space...how hard that is, for those of us who grew to adulthood with the bone-deep certainty that we did not belong in the world and that we were always in danger. The damage of emotional abuse in childhood pierces the spirit of the child and leaves scar tissue that is hard and stiff and prevents growing fully into life. Uncovering and healing that scar tissue is a lifelong challenge.<br />Take good care, Dave. And Joe, who shares in the struggle...you, too, take good care. <br />ClairesmumUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13382503094929375543noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35743239.post-88573951323989739602016-09-29T08:31:35.152-04:002016-09-29T08:31:35.152-04:00I am impressed with your wisdom on this. People ca...I am impressed with your wisdom on this. People can be jerks and it takes a lifetime to realize what is external to us but still leaves internal scars.painting with firehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01578014572547587329noreply@blogger.com